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War of the Wanton Maw

Paul Crilley Posted:
Columns Chronicles of One Telaran 0

So after six weeks of fun and games, the all traces of the carnival are gone and the War of the Wanton Maw begins, casting a shadow of apocalypse across the land. The dragon gods Maelforge and Laethys have put aside their differences to launch an all out attack on Telara. Which means the Defiant and Guardian must stop trying to kill each other for ten minutes so they can deal with this new problem.

Sigh. Poor Telara. Never a moment’s peace.

Phase 1 of this new world event (or Phase 6 of the Carnival, depending on how you look at it), is the initial surprise attack, and the quests this week revolve around simply trying to hold the forces of the Wanton and the Golden Maw at bay. Caedryn has volunteered this week, as even he can’t ignore the threat to the land. He's getting right into the thick of things, battling dragon cults, and kicking evildoers' butts. And it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that he collected enough doubloons to buy himself a spiffy new mount and mask that he wants to show off. Check it out.

Mr. Cool.

While Caedryn is parading around Sanctum showing off his new purchases, he has a chat with Captain Envris. But what Caedryn intended as a quick catch up (How you doing? How's the wife?) ended up with the Captain begging for my help. Captain Envris tells Caedryn that he needs time to shift his forces from the old battle lines to the new warfronts. And to do that he wants me to close down Fire and Earth Rifts so as to cut of the flow of reinforcements to the Dragon Cults.

Sure, says Caedryn. I can do that. By the way, what do you think of my new mount? Nice, hey?

So off Caedryn goes.

It doesn’t take long before rifts are popping up every-frikkin’-where. The call goes out for heroes to protect Wardstones from invaders so Caedryn scuttles off to the nearest attack. Once he’s defeated the invaders, he traces their route back to the Rift that spawned them, where he has a jolly good time with a few other Ascended as they kick butt and chew bubblegum.

It’s only after we’ve sealed the Rift that I realize it was a Life Rift. Not a Fire or Earth Rift that the quest calls for.

Hey, they tricked me!

Typical. But Caedryn is not deterred. He collects his rewards and checks the map for the nearest scene of trouble.

There are… rather a lot of them. The closest is Argent Glade, so Caedryn heads off to deal with the attacks there. Unfortunately, by the time he arrives it's already been taken care of. But it is not a wasted journey. Patch 1.8 has sneakily dropped between gaming sessions (more on that next week), and there's a chap hanging around very keen to teach me how to fish. Sure thing. Why not? Caedryn takes out his pole and casts his line.

Come on guys! Deal with it yourself. I've got a bite!

It doesn't take long before there's another attack though, and Caedryn is forced to stow his fishing rod away and once again defend Telara. In fact, he spends rather a lot of time battling rifts and killing bad guys. Here are a few of his greatest hits moments.

Rally to my call, Public group. For we shall defea-- Oh, he's dead.

Earth Rift? Closed for business.

What's that? I can't hear you. Because you're DEAD!

Caedryn returns to Captain Envris with the good news. If he expected some gratitude, Caedryn is to be sorely disappointed, because Captain Envris, he’s not one for the motivational speeches or the congratulatory pat on the back. I return triumphant, and what does he say? Well done, son? Good job? Caedryn, you surely do look like a hero in that new Death Mask and cool mount? No. What he says is. “Stop standing here looking for accolades and get back out into the field, Guardian! It will take more than closing two rifts to stop the combined forces of Maelforge and Laethys.”

I actually closed five rifts, but he obviously doesn’t care about that.  I’ve a good mind to just head back to Gloamwood and leave him to deal with it on his own. But I don't. Instead, I head back out to combat the forces of darkness. 'Cause that's the kind of guy Caedryn is.

 The War of the Wanton Maw comes in three phases. Phase 2 will be called Twice Burned and will involve the warriors of Telara fighting off the Dragon Cults while clever people actually try and find out what Laethys and Maelforge are up to. (I mean, besides trying to destroy everything in sight.) And Phase 3: Heroes of Telara will kick off with the Ascended uncovering the Wanton Maw’s devious plans, while a group of Laethys and Maelforge’s most trusted minions plan an even more devastating attack on Telara. But I don’t have any advance info on that, about how they plan on doing it. Caedryn will simply have to play along with the rest of you while we all try to uncover and stop the dragons’ nefarious schemes.


Paul Crilley