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Twice Burned

Paul Crilley Posted:
Columns Chronicles of One Telaran 0

Hallo everyone. Are you sitting comfortably? Good. Then let's begin.

We are now in the penultimate phase of the World Event that started off a good couple of months ago with Carnival of the Ascended. And over the weeks that followed the launch we have all been privileged to witness the five stages of partying in action. Those stages are, 1: Excitement. (The slow build up to the party. Usually starts on the Monday as you look forward to Friday.) 2: Fun. Lots of fun. (When the party actually kicks off.) 3: Arguments. (When the party-goers have imbibed too much grog and years-old grudges rise to the surface). 4: War. (When the arguments come to blows.) 5: The morning after. (When you wake up, look around you, and wonder why you’re sleeping in a bath. Metaphorically speaking, of course.)

But now we must leave our analogy behind, because it doesn’t usually extend to a drawn-out apocalyptical battle for control of the world. Which is what is happening right now in Telara. Phase 2 of the War of the Wanton Maw has kicked off and we have to try and stop the two dragon cults from taking over. As the description says, “The Ascended has uncovered a devious plot of Maelforge and Laethys to throw Telara into chaos, but the details of the dragons' plan are still unclear. The forces of the Ascended continue to fight on the field of battle while those who are capable hurry to uncover the dragon’s schemes.”

Posing over the remains of an Earth Rift. Like you do.

Now Caedryn, brilliant and amazing as he is, has not been privy to these rather cool-sounding attempts to uncover the dragons’ schemes. It’s not from a lack of trying, I assure you. Caedryn has been regaling the good captain with stories of his spying prowess, but he doesn’t seem too keen to listen. Which is a shame, because it’s a little known fact that James Bond is actually based on Caedryn.

"Come on! I want to sneak behind enemy lines and seduce women and drink shaken but not stirred beverages!"

All right, so that’s a lie. You got me. But still, some secretive spying missions could have been cool here. Oh well. Caedryn will just have to grip his two-handed broadsword (not a euphemism) and wade into battle, wielding his mighty weapon against those who fall at his feet. (Again, not a euphemism, although I can understand your confusion).

Caedryn's first task is to help tend the wounded soldiers out in the battlefield. Lieutenant Yillasia wants me to learn how to summon a Rescue Medic in the field of battle, to get the soldiers fighting fit once again. To learn this task I have to speak with Abstaffar the Mysterious inside the Sanctum of the Vigil. I head on up to speak to him, but I’m afraid Lieutenant Yillasia is going to have to find someone else to do it. Abstaffar the Mysterious is something of a scam artist. Here Caedryn is, willing to wield a power on the battlefield to help wounded Guardian fighters, and Abstaffar the Mysterious wants to charge me fifteen thousand Planarite to learn the skill. You heard that right. Fifteen thousand. And how much planarite do I have? 199. So, I’m afraid I won’t be able to help you save lives Lieutentant Yillasia. Plus, I think you should arrest Abstaffer for profiteering. Throw the scumbag in a dungeon and get him to teach the skill for free.

Fifteen thousand. Honestly.

I leave the Sanctum of the Vigil and receive another quest from a chap called Centurion Ustfer. As he says, “Our coffers can always use help, Caedryn! There is no such thing as too much gold when trying to prosecute a war. We've noticed that many of these vermin are carrying quantities of Molten Gold Ingots. Bring them to me and I'll make sure you are compensated.”

Hmm. Little alarm bells are ringing here. You know how it is. Some… less honest people out there might possibly use something like a war to enrich themselves, to put a little bit aside for when the fighting stops. Seems a bit suspicious that he is asking for molten gold ingots. Not-traceable, because they are gathered from the enemy, plus they can easily be melted down to disguise what they once were.

Of course, it is entirely possible I’m being too suspicious, so I’ll give Ustfer the benefit of the doubt.

Except I’m tested almost immediately when Ustfer casually says “I'll take 500 Molten Gold Ingots from you when you're ready.”

I’ll just bet you will, you war criminal!

But what does Caedryn care? He can’t do anything himself with the molten ingots. He just doesn’t have the criminal connections. So whatever he finds, he will sell onto Ustfer and hope that he is operating on the right side of the law.

Seriously, dude. Where are the gold ingots?

Unfortunately, it isn’t as easy as I first thought. The molten gold ingots are supposedly to be found on Rift creatures. So I head out and close down quite a few Rifts, but none of the invaders have any gold on them. Seriously. After about five separate Rifts, I start to wonder if I’m doing something wrong. I mean, sure, I’m gaining experience, and some treasure, but no gold ingots.

It's not all for nothing, however, because one of the other quests I was given in Sanctum is to kill as many fire and earth rift creatures as I could. Captain Beloray is feeling a bit hemmed in by the rifts surrounding Sanctum, and he wants me to thin out their numbers. So even though I can’t find the ingots, I’m still taking out rift creatures. And the reward for killing 15 Rift creatures is actually 25 molten gold ingots! So you know, swings and roundabouts, as they say. (I don’t know why they say that, but they do. Honest.)

Hey, Fido. I hope you're scratching and not getting ready to pee on me.

I decide to head back into Gloamwood, seeing as I'm not finding any ingots in Silverwood. Here I run across a roving band of fire goblins, and I help take them down. And finally, on their still-warm corpses, I find my gold ingots. Only 6, but still. It's a start. A very slow start, as I've got to get 500, but at least I know where to get them.


Paul Crilley