Once a year, every news writer's day is trashed by the annual "just plausible enough to maybe be real but really aren't" jokes that game developers seem to have a penchant for foisting on the world. That's right. Today is April Fools' Day, the day of silly jokes, goofy devs and outrageous pokes at the games they make. We'll be adding to the article throughout the day, so put on your chuckle shoes and join us.
Blizzard Translates Its Sites into Nerglish - For the Murloc in You!
We’re excited to announce that the official Blizzard websites are now fully localized for murloc players everywhere. One benefit of countless failed attempts at establishing peaceful relations with various murloc tribes is that we have finally unlocked the secrets of Nerglish syntax and grammar. Thanks to this breakthrough in human-to-murloc communication, murlocs everywhere will now be able to engage with their human counterparts on equal footing.
Murlocs: simply install the Nerglish Translator bookmarklet and get ready to surf our sites in your native tongue!
- Option 1—drag and drop the translator link below onto your browser’s bookmarks bar
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Option 2—manual Installation:
- Copy the translator link’s code to your clipboard
- Open your browser’s bookmark manager
- Create a new bookmark and paste the link’s code into the bookmark’s URL field
That’s it! Now you can use this bookmarklet to translate any Blizzard page into Nerglish. In the hallowed and inspiring words of Morgl, “MRRRGGK!”
Guild Wars 2: It's a Job, Not a Personal Story
Read today's full update notes here!
World Polish
- Cats in the player's home instance that are not kept entertained will now begin destroying gathering nodes and scenery at a set rate per day.
Personal Story
- The Personal Story has been renamed Professional Story to reflect that this is your character's job.
General
- Confusion now randomizes your key bindings when it is applied, in addition to its previous effects.
- Movement speed now scales with boot rarity.
Ranger
- Pets commanded to fight members of their own species will instead turn hostile and attack the ranger.
Funcom's New Conan Game - Conan Chop Chop
Quite possibly our greatest Conan game yet.
Final Fantasy XIV - Omega: Your New Smart Home Assistant
We are pleased to present Omega, the latest state-of-the-art smart home assistant that you will not be able to live without! Sign up to learn more.
Anthem Subreddit Goes The Division 2
Sometimes you just can't make this stuff up...
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League of Legends Cats vs Dogs Skins
This April Fools’, leave it all on the show floor.
Black Desert Online: Tabletop Version & Handheld 8-Bit Retro Version
Pearl Abyss has developed a special retro inspired version of Black Desert to promote the board game. Everyone who registers for a 7-day trial account or anyone who already has a Black Desert Online account can download Black Desert Classic for free. Steam and Xbox One players will automatically receive the game via email. This 8-bit handheld version of Black Desert will work with most emulators and will even work natively on most handheld consoles by uploading the file to a so called flash card. Those who are able to complete the retro challenge will be rewarded with a special code that will be displayed on the splash screen of Black Desert Classic after completion. The first 100 players who redeem the code from their account page will receive the board game for free, including a limited edition Black Spirit token.
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Like the MMORPG, Pearl Abyss plans to fully support the board game with a weekly update schedule and larger content drops such as new expansions, bosses, game modes and classes. Maintenance times will coincide with the online version of Black Desert.
War Thunder: Return of the Russian Bias 2.0
After reviewing feedback from 1.87, we understand you feel like the previous update favored the Axis nations slightly too much, so today we are here to fix that with update 2.0 Return of the Russian Bias!
This update addresses several key points of feedback, such as recent feedback to British vehicles, longstanding investigations into the Maus turret armour, making sure everyone has a premium Spitfire as well as returning some much needed Russian Bias to War Thunder!
Star Trek Online & the Gorn of Discovery
We’ve been gorn to secrecy about this for months, but it’s finally time to announce the next step in our on-gorning Discovery expansion: Star Trek Online: Gorn of Discovery! We know you're gornna love getting all the gorntent you crave! Try our newest missions, “Here Today, Gorn Tomorrow!” and “Gorn with the Wind!” Defend the gornfields of Gornar in our featured TFO, “The Gorns of Navarrone!”
- “Gorn of Discovery” includes several other new missions:
- “The Gorn Identity”
- “Who Gorns for Adonias”
- “The Last Unigorn”
And new TFOs:
- “Gorn Killers”
- “Children of the Gorn”
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Neverwinter's "Colted Assembly"
But we’ll stop stalling and get to the mane event! In a spur of the moment decision, Lukan has cast a spell on all the mounts in Neverwinter. And we mean all the mounts! Not just the mare mounts, but the whirlwinds and the constructs mounts too.
He hopes that you will embrace this new change with unbridled enthusiasm. It might seem a bit over the top, and a little lame, but no matter what you think of it, don’t worry. Like most illusions, this one won’t stick around for long! Please enjoy your temporary stick ponies while you can! You’d be a foal to miss it!
PlanetSide 2 Kazoo Horns, Failsauce Horns and "The Schnoz"
Kazoo Horns, Failsauce Horns, and The Schnoz (pictured above) will be available for use only by the best of Auraxian fighters. Don't believe us? These vehicle horns are perfect for throwing your enemies off their game, and the Schnoz works to protect the face, enhance vision, and heighten your sense of smell. This gear is incredibly effective on the battlefield, and suited for only the most serious of soldiers.
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Runescape and "Absolutely Nothing"
This week we have absolutely nothing to show you... April Fools! We’ve actually been working really hard and we’ve got a tasty selection of changes to talk about: https://t.co/HI0W9gbmhs
— RuneScape (@RuneScape) April 1, 2019
Cuisine Royale & Hunting Body Parts
Lack of body parts can be a serious impediment to victory. If a character doesn't have a head, he or she won't be able to eat, so he or she won't be able to improve their health. The hand of the starting mannequin will be enough to hold a rifle, but without their own trained muscles they won’t be able to pull up and skilfully jump over a fence directly on to the head of an unsuspecting opponent... if, of course, they have a head.
Native body parts will not only provide the characters with basic functions, but also improve their characteristics. Iron Clyde rolls will increase the protection of the hero, and his calm head will not panic and stay alive longer outside the narrowing zone. Annie's experienced diver's body will allow her to stay underwater longer, her dexterous left hand will speed up recharging, and her strong right fingers will reduce the recoil from a shot.
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Rabbids Take Over For Honor in Special Event
Are you ready for bwaaaaaaar? The Rabbids are taking over for the minions in a special, 24-hour For Honor April Fools’ Day event. Starting March 31 at 9PM PDT, and ending April 1 at 9PM PDT, players who jump into For Honor during the event will earn a melee pack as a reward. This event comes as a part of For Honor’s Year 3 content, called Year of the Harbinger, which also recently saw the addition of The Black Prior to its roster of more than 20 Knights, Samurai, Vikings, and Wu-Lin. New content will continue to roll out throughout 2019, including additional seasonal events.
Rabbids are invading For Honor for one day only! Think this is an April Fool's prank? Go in-game to find out! ??https://t.co/JXxOkn9q1b pic.twitter.com/XLojxN0loa
— For Honor (@ForHonorGame) April 1, 2019
A New Yakuza Turn-Based JRPG
World of Warcraft Companion App: Findr
Find your next tank, healer, or damage dealer at a glance with the latest update to the WoW Companion App: Findr. When you open the Findr feature, you’ll be presented with a picture and a brief description of another player, and you can decide whether they’d be the right match for your party. Features include:
- Glance at a player’s gear and achievement points for 3 seconds (maximum) before making a snap judgment about how well they’ll tank your Mythic Keystone run.
- Swipe right to request a match and immediately send a party invitation.
- Swipe left to completely dismiss the player’s entire existence; this is completely anonymous, distancing you from the other player’s growing vortex of self-doubt.
- Once a match has been made, option to not message them right away, which makes it look like you’re super busy and use Findr all the time.
When the time is right, gather your new groupmates together, and head off to whatever adventures lay in store!
There's more pokes at the WoW community and other goofy thoughts about WoW, so head to the forums to check it out.
Capcom is Hiring Zombies....why?
In just two short months, the worldwide zombie population has decreased by 774,038,013. We need your help averting the crisis caused by this sharp decline. Will you apply today?
The chaos began on January 25. Since that day, many of our colleagues have fallen to a series of stranger assault cases. At this rate, the world is on the verge of suffering from a serious zombie shortage.
We're not going to give up without a fight. To improve the current situation, we decided to hire additional staff. We welcome applicants of all ages, genders, and educational backgrounds. Please apply now.
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Corsair's Game Launcher...Launcher
Sick and tired of all your game launchers cluttering up your desktop? If so, Corsair has you covered with its just-announced "Game Launcher Launcher".
We are proud to announce our new, easy-to-use software that will change the way you manage all your games. Introducing the CORSAIR Game Launcher. #CORSAIRLauncher pic.twitter.com/HiZ5oNhZ7k
— CORSAIR (@CORSAIR) March 31, 2019
NewEgg's iBrite RGB CPU
Sure to twitterpate the hardware reviewers here at MMORPG.com! (thanks, Renoaku!).
Nvidia: Meet R.O.N. "The New Voice of Gaming"
What does the future of PC gaming look like? Watch GeForce host Julian interact with R.O.N.’s AI and hologram interface. A new era of enhanced PC gaming is here. R.O.N. taps into the full power of your GeForce RTX™ 20 Series-powered gaming rig to connect you to your games, coach you through your gameplay, and stay up-to-date on everything happening in the world of gaming. R.O.N. can even create and project 3D AR displays of maps, levels, and data to help you consistently dominate in battle.
Read more here! (Thanks, blastermaster!)
To be continued...
