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MMO's & The Modern Man (err...Woman)

An honest, irreverant look at various MMO's from a typical player's point of view. OK, maybe not a typical player. Maybe a hardcore emo PVE but PVP lovin' chataholic with alt tendencies. What's that? A new beta!? BRB...

Author: Oridi

How to give Good Chat or 5 Ways Not To Appear An Idiot.

Posted by Oridi Sunday December 6 2009 at 3:40PM
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Welcome to what is sure to be my Least Popular Post Ever!  Let's get right to it...

Fallen Earth is having issues about chat.  Yes, chat drama and it's fun but kind of silly and for me it's enough to trigger me heading back to Istaria where it might not be as cool and apocalyptic but at least the community is a bit less maniacal. 

Apparently the CoC for FE has a no cursing policy and the GM's have started patrolling the one global channel - the Help channel - pretty fiercely right now and warning folks that are cursing as well as those talking about topics other than help.  Yes, it's an M for mature game and yes, the NPC's cuss and your actual character curses during fighting.  But they're enforcing both the no cussin' and the no OOC/only help chat aspects of the CoC and channel and so folks are up in arms.  One side is hollering that the game will fail if players are driven away by teh mean ol' GM's while the other side is yelling that the dev's designed the game as an isolating experience and get over yer carebear need to emo globally.  Wait a minute.. a game that is based on the world coming to an end.. but no one is allowed to cuss or interact with each other without strict monitoring. Hmm... exactly who are these dev's?  ;-)  I kiiiidddd I kidddddddddd....

Personally, I think that the game is 2 months old and needs all the players it can get so hey - just add an optional global chat channel for OOC.  Problem solved.  But as I was listening to err... reading the drama :-) ... I realized that my opinion was being swayed more by how folks were saying/spelling their POV than what they were actually saying.  With a jolt and a shock and a final swing at a mutant coyote, I got to safety and mulled over my shamefully shallow ways.

Was I actually judging people by their ability to type? Was I turning into some old withered crone muttering in the corner about the nefarious ways of miss-spellers? What was wrong with me?  I realized that after 6 years of playing I had reached my maximum lifetime allowance of idiocy and from this point on it was gonna bug me that folks wrote loose instead of lose.  Yes, I'm not ashamed to say that with this realization I wept bitter tears.  You see I love MMO's and part of MMO's is goober chat.  It's the folks that don't have a clue and don't want a clue - the ones that type like they drive, erratically and just aiming to stay off the curb. According to popular opinion they're not going away and if I want to stay in MMO's I am going to have to get used to them.

In the words of my Fallen Earth character as she downed a Kopesh Dancer ... F*** that.

I'm going on the offensive.  No, I'm not going to correct folks ingame - I don't have time for that.  But I will offer the following Top 5 Ways Not To Appear A Goober In Chat.   I know I'm preaching to the choir here so bookmark this and send the link to the next person ingame that says they're "excited cause there friends new weapon is uber and their going to kill orcs".  *Shudder*

1.  Lose vs. Loose-

You lose your mind.  You let your horse loose.   Loose means that you unrestrict, make less tight, or let go of something.  Lose means that you can't find something.  You can remember the difference by thinking that you lose an O in the word lose.    I'm going to start sending ingame gold to random people for spelling lose right in chat.

2. Personal Attacks or You Live In Yer Mom's Basement-

Every time you attack someone in public chat with comments about their real life you lose the argument automatically and look like you're 12 years old and playing from your.. wait. NVM.  It's a clear indication that you have no actual logical way to fight their point and so you're just randomly swinging at them in the hopes that a blow will land and they'll be distracted.   The whole "yer fat/ugly/a ho/impotent/livin' in yer mom's basement" set of comments along with the accompaning "i did yer mom" collection (Do they sell these as a matched set on the home shopping network or something?) just turns off the debate and you lose.

3. They're.  Their.  There.

Oh. My. Gawd.  This one I have no witty saying for, no fun tricks.  Just learn the bleeping things.,-Their-and-They're

They're-  They're on the way to kill us now for miss-spelling this in chat.
It's a contraction for they are. They're.  The A is removed and replaced with an apostrophe.  They are going to have some pie.  They're going to have some pie.

Their- Their dictionaries will be heavy as they beat us to death with them.
It's the ownership form - they own something.  Their feet stink.  Their blows land often.

There- There better be a way to learn this or Ast is gonna kill us.
This one references a lotta different stuff..  a point in time or action and a place.  There needs to be fishsticks or Tommy won't play.  There is the pile of worthless rubble to scavenge!  Perhaps we will find a fishstick there for Tommy!  There needs to be a better way to remember all this!

4. Hawt Steamy Luv Talk

This is usually done by a female wanting attention or a guy that reallllly loves to make other guys uncomfortable.  The female is usually underage and a'larnin' about them ways teh boyz respond.  Conversations are not innuendo and teasing, they're specific descriptions about detailed actions and usually poorly described.  The end result is that the girl is branded a slut - which she then proudly embraces (ahem pun not intended ok mebbe yeah) and the guy is branded as gay.  The guy usually tries to refute his new title by hitting hard on the girl and they spin downward into a global chat luv fest with more privacy then they realize as everyone has put them on ignore after the first "My eyes widen as...".

5.  It's and Its.

It's always fun finding ways to torment my kinmates.  Last time I let loose a Bantha in front of the kinhouse and its foul breath made the guildhall unlivable.

This one is easy.  It's easy to remember and easy to apply.  With the apostrophe included it's a contraction.  It is = it's.   Without the apostrophe?  Possessive and its clear and total ownership is like a shining light in the dark.   The way to remember is that the possessive form is so greedy it won't even let go of the apostrophe.  It's clear that gaming is way too much fun to get hung up on grammer.  When Astrialla tried to teach the Bantha the correct spelling of words its first response was to bite her head off.

Sigh.  I think that I've probably offended, alienated, and annoyed you all enough for one blog post.   I promise I'll be back next time with something spicy and entertaining with a dash of intellectual stimulation.... really....