Originally posted by nobodycool

Originally posted by skydragonren

I do understand the difference between chemical dependant addiction and other types.

 

You can make all the excuses you want in the world. The FACT of the matter is, everyone who cries addiction, did it to themselves, AND had the choice to do it or not.

Even once a addict is addicted chemically you still have the choice to stop.

Scientist can cover for these people all they want. It was the choice that got them there, and its the choice that is going to take it away.

Yeah if a heroine addict stops using he goes through physical pain. Either he has the willpower to want to stop it, and get the medical attention needed to survive the withdrawal, or he just dies an "addict"

None of these people have an excuse to me. You can beat anything if you want to, just takes the will to make it happen.

Anyway can get help if they need it, 90% of the true addicts in the world, simply do not want it.

 

 

We are not disagreeing and once again your past is certainly coloring your perspective(as mine surely colors my perspective) but I do not think that people are "pussies" because they lack willpower. I am not even certain what "willpower" is or where it comes from? Can you measure it? Can it be stripped from you with constant and brutal treatment that destroys your will? Is willpower something we are born with or is it something created. Obviously children lack willpower so we will assume it is something that is created by society. This would be to say that willpower is as much a myth as addiction. I might even go so far to say as willpower is a bigger myth simply because our inherent animalstic natures are the real rulers of our mind and addiction serves those pleasure sectors well. I agree that addicts do have a choice though, my argument is that the drugs have eroded their ability to be strong enough to make the right choice in many cases. This is not an excuse to validate their behaviour or decisions. It is simply the truth. *shrug*

That is a good point.

How does one measure "willpower" and where does willpower come from.

In the case of are we born with it, I think we are. My 2 year old daughter shows some of the dominant willpower I think I have seen in a child. She knows and fully understands the actions in which she takes and also tries to impose her will on others.

By will I simply mean what she wants or doesn't want. You can argue the parent influences the child. Children from birth though learning from the parent also take on a certain persona of their own, which is why we all have individual personalities. If not we would all be clones of who raised us, and technically if that were true, in theory, I should be an alcoholic wife beater. I am my own individual and my will is my own. Regardless of what I have seen in the past.

You keep saying my opinions are colored by what I have seen in the past. I do not agree with this. I have never let what I have seen in the past affect my life growing up or have any affect on my life as an adult. I could really care less what my father did.

He was a weak willed individual as far as I am concerned, and a coward for hitting a woman. Those are all choices that he made.

I also blame my mother. She had the choice to leave and stop the abuse against her, but did not. She could have taken my brother and I away from it all, but chose not to.

Decision are everything. Driving home, turning right may result in an accident causing your death, while turning left results in you making it home safely to your wife and kids. Sure something down that right side of the road caused your death, but it was ultimately your decision to make the turn and step on the gas. So who's fault was it really. I guess you should have turned left.

So what is willpower. To me willpower is the ability to change the influences around you directly by your individual decisions alone.

In this instance we are talking about a negative entity on ones life in the form of gaming, and the solution would be to stop or halt the negative entity through choice and change of ones life. This person would need the ability to directly change the influences around him/her to gain what they wish to achieve. Therefore needing willpower.

In this instance of gaming, it is very easily achieved. There is no chemical dependency, so the illusion of resistance is all mental.

Stopping a game "addiction" isn't hard. You do not get the shakes if you can't play mario brothers. You are not going into shock or have your muscles lock up because you can't log into wow. You simple have to make a simple decision. Login, or not login.

Can this person make the choice to rebuild a life worth living without gaming?

We can't answer this only the OP can.

I do find this topic fascinating though.

 Well..

I say all video games do have an affect on kids. Mine included.

I occasionally get this rage behavior from my 9 year old like this if I peel them off SPORE or something like it.  The lock in the room works best.

Are the kids addicted?

I dont know.

Other examples are out there:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_RrN28d5LE&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=stHF-8GPz0c&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRh7qHU6LqM&NR=1

Originally posted by fansede

 Well..

I say all video games do have an affect on kids. Mine included.

I occasionally get this rage behavior from my 9 year old like this if I peel them off SPORE or something like it.  The lock in the room works best.

Are the kids addicted?

I dont know.

Other examples are out there:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_RrN28d5LE&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=stHF-8GPz0c&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRh7qHU6LqM&NR=1

Yeah, I have watched all those before Fans.

Thing is when I relate that back to how I was raised as a child, well let's just say that would never have happened in my day where I grew up.

If I through a fit like that around my parents or grandparents, I got a swift kick in the ass, off to bed without dinner.

Parents are to easy on the kids nowadays which is why our malls in the US are slam full of lil smart mouthed punk ass kids with no respect for anyone or anything.

Parents just dump their kids there so they don't have to parent them.

I do applaud you for locking them in the room. That is at least more than what most kids get.

Kids like these in the videos are social outcast or well on their way to becoming one. Who in the hell throws a hissy like that over a video game.

If I was the parent I would have smashed the monitor and disconnected the internet that day. That would be after a swift kick in the ass, and a 1 month grounding if not more. No TV , no friends, no Nintendo DS, nothing but some school work and some food to scarf down then back to your room. Lil whiney ass brat.

Kids in america today are spoiled ass rotten, and 90% of them need to spend a week in a Juvie cell with some real hard hitting teens to realize just how good most of them have it.

But that is just me.

Originally posted by booboofinger

If you are truly as ambitious as you say you are, then you should muster up the strength to get your gaming under control.

If not, I hear there is a clinic in Amsterdam that deals with gaming addiction. Buy I'm sorry to say, even they say gaming is NOT an addiction. Not to mention that you might get some other "addictions" while you are there...

 

This is what I thought when I read his story.

From dictionary.com:

1. Ambitious, aspiring, enterprising describe a person who wishes to rise above his or her present position or condition.

3. Requiring or showing much effort; challenging: an ambitious schedule.

News flash! you aren't ambitious as you think you are. If you were, you'd be doing something with your life, that is in fact the definition of ambitious. You're more of a dreamer, you dream of great things you could do and then do nothing, there is a big difference. Grow up, stop acting like a stupid high school kid and you'll be fine. Otherwise, if you love MMOs so much and you are ambitious - combine your ambitions and addiction into something that makes you rich.

I can't even fathom what my life would be like today if MMOGs were around when I was 11. Growing up with my friends in the 80s, we sure played the hell out of single player games mostly during cold days but 75 % of our time was spent OUTSIDE. We played street and tackle football at the park, stickball, softball, handball, hockey, basketball, went to beaches/pools in the summer, went fishing and best of all, we mimicked the great movies of the 80s and played imaginary games.

The internet has ultimately changed the way millions of children grow up now. It's ludicrous to think a child is sitting in front of their computer instead of enjoying the best years of their life. It just bothers me to no end.

With that said, you have the last say in this. You know deep down inside that your priority is your future and should stop COLD TURKEY and focus on your future career. After you rent you first apartment or buy a house and all is good, then you could come home from work and enjoy these worlds with the rest of us.

Good luck.

Originally posted by acidworm

I can't even fathom what my life would be like today if MMOGs were around when I was 11. Growing up with my friends in the 80s, we sure played the hell out of single player games mostly during cold days but 75 % of our time was spent OUTSIDE. We played street and tackle football at the park, stickball, softball, handball, hockey, basketball and best of all, we mimicked the great movies of the 80s and played imaginary games.

The internet has ultimately changed the way millions of children grow up now. It's ludicrous to think a child is sitting in front of their computer instead of enjoying the best years of their life. It just bothers me to no end.

With that said, you have the last say in this. You know deep down inside that your priority is your future and should stop COLD TURKEY and focus on your future career. After you rent you first apartment or buy a house and all is good, then you could come home from work and enjoy these worlds with the rest of us.

Good luck.

^ THIS

QFT Acidworm well done.

That is also how I spent the 80's. Little Mario bros here and there, maybe some zelda. Contra was fun in the winter.

But 75% of the time my ass was out hussling girls, swimming at the lake, playing tackle football with the neighborhood kids.... good times good times.

Also makes me kinda ill inside to know all the kids just wasting life, and once it's gone, they can't get it back.

Originally posted by skydragonren

To me, addiction is a word made by some pussy long ago who had no willpower and decided he needed a new name for being a pussy so he chose addict.

.....

You are an ass. 

To the OP.

I am a 40 year old long time gamer and drug addict. Don't listen to anyone on this forum.

If you want to stop and you can't, tell your parents you want to see a therapist.

I just quit smoking after being addicted to nicotine for 28 years. Everyone says when you quit smoking it sucks for about 3 days. Well it was one month of hell for me. I wasn't able to drive or go out in public.

Different people are different. If you can't limit your time, then quit gaming altogether. If you can't do that, see a therapist.

But the good news is you are still young. And if you take action now, no harm done.

First of all- addiction comes in many forms and some cannot yet be explained, but don't delude yourself or anyone else with nonsense of people with addictions being pussies... Your brain reacts electrically and chemically in different ways to different stimulants- and this is different from person to person. Unless you are an epicurean, one day you will find something that makes you feel such a way- that you find yourself thinking about it when your not doing it and surely enough finding ways to do it instead of think of it. I personally have never been addicted to anything, and apparently neither have you- but addiction is real but I suppose you don't believe in evolution either, and that's ok... but when someone actually comes looking for advice and you tell them to just stop being a pussy, you deserve to be punched in the mouth.

Now to address the OP- I would suggest first canceling the subscription and telling your parents about your ambitions and asking them to hang on to the credit card (if its yours or theirs) and just tell them how you feel and tell them not to let you use it... if you find yourself compelled to steal it back, call the bank and tell them to put a stop payment- have your parents say my son keeps trying to play this damn game, I don't want this card being used for "blah blah blah"... also- give away your account info in open chat- spam it then log out... Anything you can do to make it a hassle for yourself to possibly play again.

As someone who knows dream weaver well and gaming even more- you have to make it entertaining for yourself- there are numerous sites with lots of videos on how to get started in DW infact I know the disc that comes with it has some video intros and the site link for more. If you find yourself getting bored with it- then take a break, if you burn yourself out you will be screwed altogether. Also maybe pick a project, instead of just "learning dreamweaver" say "Hey, I'm going to develop an i'm addicted to gaming site" or even ilikedarkmeat.com- whatever it may be, choose something you are passionate about and then learn that way... Task by task "How do I make a cool background" "How bout nifty buttons... " etc etc etc.

And good luck.

There... that's what I got... I hope it helped, now help yourself.

Originally posted by skydragonren

You keep saying my opinions are colored by what I have seen in the past. I do not agree with this. I have never let what I have seen in the past affect my life growing up or have any affect on my life as an adult. I could really care less what my father did.

How you are raised, the environment, and the people in the environment positively alter you as a person. It has been proven many times that this is true. Trying to act like a "badass" and say you were in complete control of how you turned out is just plain naive and wrong. Even if you never told your story, from a psychological perspective, it's pretty easy to see you had an unfortunately hard upbringing in your childhood.

Examples are you are unnecessarily aggressively to people that need help and in your eyes makes them a "pussy" and are "weak". Some people are wired differently and aren't like you. Your difficult upbringing obviously made you have a tough exterior and able to handle a lot of stress and problems, good that you turned a negative into a positive. Others were raised differently and don't fit your perspective, so have a little slack. A "swift kick in the ass" isn't always the best answer.

So please, don't preach "it's your fault you turned left". Some people had to turn left or thought left was the best choice at the time. Everything is not under your control. You're articulate and obviously intelligent and have a good head on your shoulders, but everything simply does not fit into your little box.

Amen skydragonren

My heart goes out to these kids. I would give my life up if they could experience life in the 80s, even early 90s. No irc, myspace or twitter, no webcams or texting. It's like a nation of zombies. I feel so blessed to have been outside during those crucial years. And when I had to be inside, the toys and cartoons we had access to back then were too good to be true. Look at the TV programming/toys for kids todays, I can't even put into words how obscenely horrible they are. Sadly, that's why I can't blame them for turning to the internet when they're indoors. And this is why if ever there was a time where limits NEED to be imposed, it's now. If their parents don't care enough to limit their time, why should they?

Regardless of this high speed internet world that gets more deeper by the day, there's alot of kids out there who "get it" and you would think their parents steered them to the right path. But there's alot more kids out there who don't get it and they will be in for a rude awakening when reality finally hits them.

In the meantime, everytime a kid loses his cool after his 12th straight hour of play and starts blurting obscenities in my time of relaxation, I will remind him that there is a world outside waiting for them. It's the least I could do.

 Ok, you all may call me Lucifer after this...

What if your passion for MMOs could be channeled productively? You could get a job as a game tester, write (and maybe sell) game guides,  actually make money in games like Project Entropia, SoE Exchange and similar games.

Just saying if you are passionate about MMO gameplay , you may find something useful. If it is disupting your relationship with others close to you then by all means get help

Originally posted by fansede

What if your passion for MMOs could be channeled productively? You could get a job as a game tester, write (and maybe sell) game guides,  actually make money in games like Project Entropia, SoE Exchange and similar games.

Just saying if you are passionate about MMO gameplay , you may find something useful.

This is something I considered myself. I eventually realized that there were underlying reasons as to why I played games so much. I also came to the conclusion that, despite the fact I'd be doing work that I loved, I wouldn't be able to stop playing long enough to get any real work done.

Originally posted by Cereo

Originally posted by booboofinger

If you are truly as ambitious as you say you are, then you should muster up the strength to get your gaming under control.

If not, I hear there is a clinic in Amsterdam that deals with gaming addiction. Buy I'm sorry to say, even they say gaming is NOT an addiction. Not to mention that you might get some other "addictions" while you are there...

 

 

This is what I thought when I read his story.

From dictionary.com:

1. Ambitious, aspiring, enterprising describe a person who wishes to rise above his or her present position or condition.

3. Requiring or showing much effort; challenging: an ambitious schedule.

 

News flash! you aren't ambitious as you think you are. If you were, you'd be doing something with your life, that is in fact the definition of ambitious. You're more of a dreamer, you dream of great things you could do and then do nothing, there is a big difference. Grow up, stop acting like a stupid high school kid and you'll be fine. Otherwise, if you love MMOs so much and you are ambitious - combine your ambitions and addiction into something that makes you rich.

I could not agree with you more.  I would even go a step further and say he's not a dreamer, he's spoiled, plain and simple.

The first clue comes when he mentions throwing his $2,000 computer out the window. A computer that also happens to have at least another $600 plus in programs, assuming he does not have the full Adobe Suite.

I'm willing to bet money mommie and daddie bought him that. They probably also buy him $500 shoes, $70 T-shirts and I would not be surprized if they bought him a BMW too. That is his plight. It's not that he's pissing his life way,  but that he knows that if he keeps his course of action, he will never be able to afford those things.  And deep down he knows his parents will not be able to bank him and buy him all the best while he is living with them when he's in his 40's playing whatever MMO is hip then.

Simply put, if he wants to change, he has  3 options:

1- grow up and be responsable

2- Channel his like of video games and get a job in the gaming industry

3 - go see a therapist and piss some more of his parent's money away.

And please, coming here crying about being addicted to video games is the same thing as going to bar and crying that you are an alchoholic....

 He probab