While the little emoticons should keep you occupied for a moment lets consider the vast posting about really a myriad of topics covering AOC's complete and utter failings as an MMO, but for clarities sake lets limit them to 3 and compare the game to a relationship.....(edited adding emoticons for effect)

1) Most of the features on the BOX at LAUNCH, not to mention those features touted, in numerous ads in print, audio, video and every other form of ad spam possible, by the developers were not in the game. Many are not in the game TODAY, this very moment youre reading this article. And probably wont be when you happen across this article in say december of this year or even march 2009 for that matter. This is roughly the same as the first time you get to see the girl youve decided to date without makeup.  At this point youre a lil shocked but you know her and she is familiar and youve already moved some of your stuff to her hourse or vice versa.  Roughly the same way we all felt as we began to notice that AOC was not what they had been promising us all along. However, some of us had purchased new PC's, upgraded old ones, or spent alot of time telling our buddies how HOT our new game was to be able to admit to ourselves that the game flat out sucked and we couldnt live with her anymore.

2) After the bait and switch there are PROMISES. Now there are promises one makes for life, like for example, getting married. I did not want to marry AOC, though I did hope to have a long and wonderful relationship with this game. Now that being said, as it is in every relationship, you can only take being lied to so many times. June of this year she promised me PVP, June came and passed and then she changed her target date to July, but after august came and passed I pretty much had figured out that she was cheating on me with a guy name ERLING or something like that and they were eating and drinking merrily off my credit card.

3) Then she stops taking your phone calls. Well we've all been there, the sad lil place you arrive at in a relationship when you aren't quite sure its worth giving up on and you try to reason with her, at which point her annoying bitch friend named Jenny steps in and starts answering the phone and hanging up on you.

This is roughly the same thing that took place in Age of Conan. Now taking into account that Erling Ellison or whatever the hell his name is looks like his chances of getting any action outside the bounds of the red light district hover somewhere around that of the pope converting to ISLAM. They chose to turn to the community to be their lil JENNY FRIEND and convert what was left of the FANBOIS into devoted and misguided Conan Nazis patrolling the forums with all the zeal of good little facists and all the power of a paid funcom employee.  Banning anyone that DARED speak the truth of what was actually going on in the game and with the development arc.
 

I do expect that at some point AOC will come crawling back to me via email, begging me to come back and give the NEW HER a shot again. She will talk of the old times we had together and try to suck me into yet another round of female induced hysteria.  She will promise the world and in the end I will remember being banned from the forums and remember that I hate that bitch JENNY so much that nothing short of giving me a Mercedes could make me want to endure the treatment I suffered from the JENNIES of the forums and I will promptly HANG UP on FUNCOM.

If this is the sort of MMO experience you are seeking - HAVE AT IT - but you wont even respect yourself in the morning. 

-Lum

atleast she has nice tits.

But are they worth the cost of ownership?

Originally posted by lumache

But are they worth the cost of ownership?

no, but damn...she does have a fine pair

Dude, you should be a professional writer, and unless you are one - you are definitely missing your true calling!

Overall, I think we've become very spoiled...  I remember the days of Diablo numero uno, how we actually used our imagination and sometimes wit to make the best of the very very few we had...  But I digress.

Great writing, I enjoyed it.  And I definitely will steer clear of Age of Conan from now on, because I actually felt the pain you've injected into this post without even having tried the game.

Originally posted by LordLeMoyne

Dude, you should be a professional writer, and unless you are one - you are definitely missing your true calling!

 

Overall, I think we've become very spoiled...  I remember the days of Diablo numero uno, how we actually used our imagination and sometimes wit to make the best of the very very few we had...  But I digress.

 

Great writing, I enjoyed it.  And I definitely will steer clear of Age of Conan from now on, because I actually felt the pain you've injected into this post without even having tried the game.

Thank you for your kind words....

I do believe that at some level these games are relationships, with the developers, with the game itself and all the wonder they create in us, and with the communities we develop within them.  That being said, I really feel like AOC was the HOT chic I couldnt resist who proved to be just skin deep after the first few rolls in the hay.  As in all things like this however, the beauty fails and the reality sets in, and eventually it becomes undeniable. Flash is flash and if there is nothing underneath no relationship will last.

I would have loved for my honeymoon to have lasted longer with AOC.

-Lum

agreed...it was very well written...so well written that i'm pissed at jenny and i didn't even know her a few minutes ago

Originally posted by gryjin

agreed...it was very well written...so well written that i'm pissed at jenny and i didn't even know her a few minute ago

ROFL <really> , well at least LOL, I almost spewed beer all over the place and that would be a waste of beer ! Serioursly you made me actually laugh and I am still laughing as I post this response!

For a moment there I thought I was reading a post by "Lum the Mad".

Well written, enjoyable and oh so true!

You, my friend, should start a blog! And when you do please drop us a line!

Originally posted by Rebn77

For a moment there I thought I was reading a post by "Lum the Mad".

Well written, enjoyable and oh so true!

You, my friend, should start a blog! And when you do please drop us a line!

First off, thanx for the kind words.

Hmm.. not sure the world is ready for my radical, THE GAME SHOULD BE A GAME, RADICAL nature!

Have some of us forgotten what makes a game good? Funcom MOST certainly has forgotten more about making MMOS than a 2 year old ever knew!  But in all games, there needs to be a cohesive universe that makes some kinda sense, a foundation if you will, for the community to develop itself around. There just is nothing about this game that indicates to me that they seriously wanted to create anything other than short-term recovery of their investment.  I think this is the fact we are circling around when we post our angry thoughts toward funcom..... The elephant in the room noone can quite see clearly..... or everyone see's so clearly that we've forgotten to mention it, as its poop smells so bad, we have stopped complaining about the core issues but rather the stink they cause?

nm lol

Originally posted by Jackthecat

atleast she has nice tits.

AAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA

ROFL2TEHMAX0RZS!

Funny post!

Originally posted by axe_hero

Originally posted by Jackthecat

atleast she has nice tits.

 

AAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA

ROFL2TEHMAX0RZS!

Not sure how to take this post... but hey you gave me a bump.... I meant what I said in the OP in a very real way.... Its interesting, none the less, that some people cant see past the boobs! I have not loaded or launched WOW for some years and when I say years, unlike some that would post to make a point, I mean years, and yet I find myself longing for that drive to play anything these days... even WOW.

Originally posted by Jackthecat

Originally posted by lumache

But are they worth the cost of ownership?

 

no, but damn...she does have a fine pair

I subscribed to a nice pair of tits once, but I cancelled after about 3 months.

Originally posted by gestalt11

Originally posted by Jackthecat

Originally posted by lumache

But are they worth the cost of ownership?

 

no, but damn...she does have a fine pair

 

I subscribed to a nice pair of tits once, but I cancelled after about 3 months.

Here lies the remnants of what could have been a great game. Read above to see why its now buried here!
 

Just bumping so Protus can see this post. I know he only looks the first five of any forums!

The smiley faces are to hold his insterest!

Nice post Lum.  You and Lit should get together and write an analogy about the how funcom stock prices are in the tank and how its failing.  I have a feeling Litigator got suspended for a few days for his post about funcom and norweigen currency yesterday.

Originally posted by Hamrtime2

Nice post Lum.  You and Lit should get together and write an analogy about the how funcom stock prices are in the tank and how its failing.  I have a feeling Litigator got suspended for a few days for his post about funcom and norweigen currency yesterday.

Yea , I dont yet quite get what constitutes a violation and not.... I really think its like how the MOD see's the post and reacts to it more than any clearly defined ruleset.... Most of the bans I see are justified here but there are some that leave me puzzled.  Even when they banned me - it was justified, but then again I had just quit AOC and I was seriously pissed that I was forum banned minutes after clicking the CANCEL button and removing my credit card info... maybe the choice words I entered when they asked for a reason for my departure were over the top, but hey, THEY ASKED!

The difference between a woman and Funcom is you know she has what you want its just a question of getting it.

Where as Funcom just has empty promises makes them kinda like phone sex where you end up with nothing when all is said and done but a big phone bill.