Originally posted by Sijjistoryus

My wife and I played Diablo 2.

Years later...

 

Diablo 3 was about to release. I purchased her an expensive gaming laptop (she wanted a laptop). I bought her a D3 CE Edition. She played it 4 times. Her sister now has the laptop and Blizzard has my 80 bucks.

I wasn't going to comment in this thread, but wow. You got pwned... Maybe she will ike PoE?

Playing mmo's with your girlfriend

I see, pasted in from a phone-editor or Word or some other silly-buggers typographic mess?

(inserted grave accent (U60) instead  of an apostrophe (U27), bugged me given that it's in no way a quotation....just curious how that happened)

`'´ I can't even intentionally force my phone to use either grave or acute accent characters. :now I'm baffled:

I can't tell whether this thread is serious or not because the OP's attitude toward his "woman" almost seems like a parody of old fashioned patriarchal machoism. 

If you really want a serious answer, however, I will give one.  You like gaming.  It's a hobby of yours.  It's part of who you are.  Nobody should have to change or be embarassed about their hobbies (presuming the hobby is ethical) in order to satisfy anyone else.  Rather, you should find someone who accepts your hobby. 

I also don't believe it's important to have a significant other who shares your hobby.  Quite the contrary, it's usually very healthy for you to each have your own hobbies and interests.  You should certainly share some activities together and spend time together doing things that interest you both (or sometimes sacrifices have to be made and you each have to do something the other enjoys even though you may not), but you also need to be able to get some time away and do your own things every now and then.  It's all about a healthy balance. 

I suggest you try to make her understand that gaming is something you do and a part of who you are.  Show her the pros of gaming, and how you play games responsibly like you would any other hobby.  You can certainly invite her to play with you if she seems receptive, but don't press the issue.  There's no need to force her to play with you. 

Originally posted by Greyhooff

Originally posted by Bigbadwlf

Tera is the best MMO for relationships with your girlfriend.

I've played pretty much every MMO under the sun, including GW2, which she liked very much, but Tera was definitely the best for us.  A lot of people complain about Tera's linear gameplay, this is actually a huge plus when you are playing with your girlfriend.  In GW2 I would stop in the middle of a heart quest to do an event, and that would drive her crazy.  Also GW2 has a lot of false choices in class design, she didn't understand the concept of min/maxing stats and that would lead to arguments.  Last but not least the game doesn't have the trinity, so I would be slaughtering my group of mobs and she would be getting killed by her group.

Tera's linear structure might make the game more repetitive, but it also leads to a lot less arguments, which is a next boost in quality time together.  She picks a dps class and she has all the tools she needs to do her job effectively, I pick a tank and hold aggro so she can focus on doing her job which is dps, and everybody has a good time.  She's also the artistic type so she likes games that look beautiful, but she doesn't like spending money on high end gaming rigs.  Tera just looks so much better on lower settings then most MMOs.

And keep in mind, I'm not bashing either game, as a veteran gamer I enjoy both games for their unique styles.  However since we are talking about game relationships, out of all the mmos we tried together, Tera was definitely #1 on her list, and since she wears the pants in the relationship, it's #1 on my list as well.

 

I'm surprised she doesn't object to the pedophile depiction of little girls in short skirts in TERA.

Most of the women I know object strongly to that stuff. Then too, they have kids, so maybe that's why they have that perspective.

The whole pedo argument is largely fabricated.  I haven't heard a single complaint from people that actually plays games or watch anime about Tera's Elins, female or otherwise.  Be careful of that vocal minority on the internet.

Back on topic, there's a lot of female posters saying that the best thing to do is compromise with your significant other, that's not being realistic.  I actually work with a lot of females and one of them said straight up (in a slightly sarcastic tone) that her husband's hopes and dreams died when he married her, and the other women nodded in acknowledgement, so take from that info what you will.

Love it or not, the OP's gaming career is over if his woman says it's over.  I've been gaming for a long time, and everybody that I knew got in a loving relationshp vanished from the gaming industry, and soon it will be your turn.  I'm one of the few lucky ones in that I found a game that my girl is willing to play with me with, otherwise I would be in a similiar situation.

Originally posted by pmw4friend

Playing mmo`s with your girlfriend

I`m an mmo player and always will be. I been playing mmo`s for as long as i can remember. I only been with my girl a couple of months.

She does not like to see me playing a lot, so when im playing she will be like " Why do you spend more time with playing that stupid game?"

but the fact is that i spend most of my time with her or at work, i only play when im tired and want to relax. so when she says that i be like "women you better come your horses, i play when ever the hell i want to play! so come your a** down im going to play whether you like it or not..."

so my question to you all is "should your girlfriend/boyfriend let you play mmo`s or not let you play because they want you to spend more time with them."

Batchelor a word you ever heard? haha joking.  I can see why, it is time you do not want to spend with them and would rather spend with strangers (well internet-friends).  It would piss me off as well. 

Does your gf not have a job?  Are you guys living together?  Does she have her own friends? 

If she had a job, you could play while she is working.

If you aren't living together, alone time to play games will happen no matter what.

If she has her own friends, let her go out with them, and play games.

Of course, what you all describe makes me happy I'm not straight!  Men are very understanding when it comes to other men's hobbies!

You need to alternate: pay them some attention, play a while, pay them some attention, play a while etc and don't leave too long a gap between the attention parts.

Think of it like watering a plant but a plant that needs a lot of watering - except when they're watching their favourite shows when they'll want you to **** off and not bother them.

Originally posted by fiftyplusgeek
I only play MMOs with my girlfriend when my wife is out of town.

 thanks for the laugh

On Topic:

My wife doesn't game, apart from some android games on her phone. We do allot of things together but we also have our "own" time, "own time" for her it's mostly shopping, girlfriends, for me it's friends/gym and gaming. These are just things we often might do on without eachother. She's also a teacher so we have a sort of small office at home, where when she has to do some work at home, rapports etc.., I can either do the same or play games. Same like this moment I'm here on mmorpg.com, she's working besides me working on her new group plan for next week. And she also has her own hobby's

I have tried to get her intrested in games, but they just arn't something she likes, but she also doesn't dislike me liking games. She actually enjoy's me gaming more then me going out with friends.

Which brings me back to OP wondering if his wife/girlfriend also has her own hobby's? If so then shouldn't you alway's respect both hobby's even if they might be very different from eachother? Perhaps if as you say you spend allot of time with her aswell my questions might be more appropriate to ask your girlfriend

Originally posted by Zunaah

Thankfuly I don't have this problem. I'm already a gamer chick and I converted my man to MMO's

dito

Next time she tells you that, just ask her to list a single hobby that she enjoys *and* actively pursues.  If all she can list is "music, movies, drinking, and hanging out with friends" then you may as well leave her.  Most everyone likes those things to some degree, so she may as well included "eating" or "bathing" as hobbies.

I have an ex that essentially did nothing but work all week so that she could hit the clubs on the weekends.  That was her life, and I found it incredibly boring.  She couldn't afford to travel with me when I would go on vacation or go kayaking or rock climbing or something.  When we were home, she basically needed my attention the whole time.  She had no hobbies, no interests.  She couldn't just sit back and enjoy a book or watch a movie or something.  She either needed me there with her watching the movie, or she'd need to go hang out with her friends (which just means go get drunk).  Every single night.  It was laughable every time she'd complain about me.

In short, people don't change.  If she's complaining about whatever it is you do, then it's best to just string her along for sex until someone better comes along.

First, careful what you wish for, because getting your gf to play mmo's with you is not necessarily the answer.  A lot of girls have expectations going into these games and seeing them interact negatively with other players can really shatter your perception of them.  In the end they might not 'get' how to socially interact with guilds, etc, and it is important that you do not let that change your opinion of them.

If you do decide to play a game with her start with something easy that neither of you know how to play.  If you dominate her in a game or you know everything and are constantly talking and telling her how everything works it takes part of the enjoyment out for her.  Let her learn to play on her own; if the game is made for casual players then it will be sufficient to teach her how to play.  Let her tell YOU about whats going on, etc.  It helps a lot.  Also try to tell what she likes about the game and let her spend more time doing that sort of thing.  Tell her shes good at that part of the game and you are good at the parts she does not like; sort of like a yin-yang.  Find games that she would like based off of what you learn.  I know this stuff sounds really basic but as you play and relax you will forget about this advice: you need to remind yourself constantly.  Dont get too excited that she is playing with you or it becomes a chore for her because its something she is doing 'for you'.

If you want more freedom and time from your girlfriend to play games then that is something that has less to do with video games and more to do with how much time you spend on your relationship.  The activity you want to do alone doesn't really matter; the problem is that she doesn't give you enough alone time  If you aren't too attached then maybe just move on.  Some girls want a lot of time and some girls very little; it is amazing how variable this is so why try to change someone who probably cannot be changed?

Otherwise, you need to realize that different people show their love differently.  Some physically, some by trying to impress their significant other, some do it by wanting to do everything together, some show it by giving out $$ and gifts, some show their love by getting emotional and jealous at a whim.  Depending on who you talk to, some of these behaviors can be unhealthy.  If you think your girlfriends behaviors are unhealthy but you want to stay with her then you need to be 100% honest, and do it in a non-confrontational, caring, understanding way and work in lots of good things about her as you slowly feed her the bad news that she is f**king crazy.  I'd just leave her though, seriously, you will get over it.

Theres also a chance that you are playing way too many video games and ignoring her.  But if that is the case you really do not know:  She will be telling you this is the case, regardless.  You are both biased parties.  I'd ask someone else, but they will probably just give you a biased b*ll$h@t answer too.  In the end, if you are ignoring her, part of you probably doesnt want to be with her, and you need to be honest with yourself about that.  Also start being honest with yourself about how much time you spend gaming or on the computer; write it down.  Then browse the web and talk to friends and decide how long you think is acceptable to spend gaming per day and have a serious discussion with her about it.

Originally posted by asmkm22

Next time she tells you that, just ask her to list a single hobby that she enjoys *and* actively pursues.  If all she can list is "music, movies, drinking, and hanging out with friends" then you may as well leave her.  Most everyone likes those things to some degree, so she may as well included "eating" or "bathing" as hobbies..

+1.  Almost totally agree except... A lot of people will either not want to state their hobbies or they think their hobbies are one thing when really they are another.  That doesnt make them bad people or anything it just is how it is.

Originally posted by TheScavenger
My imaginary gf plays MMOs and a lot of other games with me. But for some reason when we join a larger group for a dungeon or something, no one responds to her at all. No one even lets her have loot or anything. She gets rather annoyed about that.

She sounds like a lot of girl gamers; what a b1#ch.

Originally posted by Edeus

Does your gf not have a job?  Are you guys living together?  Does she have her own friends? 

+1

Originally posted by tom_gore

Keep your hobbies and ho's separate.

It's the only way.

+1

man i had many many girlfriends most of them hate games and hate me to be playing games  but once in a while i get one that gets into it for a couple years when she starts up on you need to grab her pick her up ravage her with afections then when your finished  go back to your damn game give her what she wants  man then go back  to your game or you be one these mofos crying how your women left you over games

I've been playing with my gf in GW2. She's a ranger, i'm a warrior.

She doesn't care how long I spend playing as long as I get my work done. And I do enjoy spending time with her.

Originally posted by Vorch

I've been playing with my gf in GW2. She's a ranger, i'm a warrior.

My GF likes GW2 too.  I think the heart/dynamic quests help a lot to keep things interesting for girls.  Also clicking 'accept quest' I think girls tend to not like that whole concept.  Guys probably don't either really it is rather dumb.

The nice thing about GW2 is it can be pretty complex combat-wise if you want to look into (for the guy).  If you have a more casual player (the girl) they can just button mash and help each other when you are in a down state it makes you feel like you are sharing something together.

Me being a girl, I can say when my Fiancee is playing a game I don't like, it kinda bothers me rofl. However, im a gamer as well, be we like different types of games. He is into a lot of RTS games like Starcraft. I don't actually stop him from playing his RTS games though. Him and I have been looking for a game to play together. So far we been playing TERA Online mostly.

Oh also I want to point this out because I saw someone talk about the clothing in TERA. I hardly see it as a problem. I think the Elin are cute. I will say, I am a pretty big anime fan though. So im kinda used to it. I think the people who talk about pedo crap and such just because of a game with a fictional character is just plain being rediculous.