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Off-Topic Discussion  » Are online relationships bad?

15 posts found
  TheScavenger

Hard Core Member

Joined: 7/05/12
Posts: 699

Those who ask a question, are stupid for 30 seconds. Those who never ask, are stupid for life.

 
OP  1/23/13 6:48:03 PM#1

But that female may be a 50 year old axe murderer who is really a male!

 

True for some years back.

 

Solution, and should be done anyway: Skype with them

 

Yup, simple as that. Skype. Then you'll see them for yourself, their face and everything.

 

Back when there was no video converence or Skype, online relationships were far too risky.

 

Now its as risky as real life ones. I met a young woman at starbucks, turns out she was literally a psycho path (not joking, she was the stand over the bed with a knife type)...and I only found out a couple weeks into the relationship what she was really like.

 

So any relationship or meeting anyone, online or real life is the same amount of "risk". Thanks to skype, online relationships are just as good as real life ones. And obviously if they refuse to skype, that is a HUGE red flag...time to move on.

Isabella and Laenaya are on Photobucket!

http://s4.photobucket.com/user/Vendayn/library/Skyrim/Anime%20Skyrim

My (mostly) scenery screenshots of heavily modded Skyrim

http://s4.photobucket.com/user/Vendayn/library/Skyrim/Anime%20Skyrim/Aesthetics

  TheScavenger

Hard Core Member

Joined: 7/05/12
Posts: 699

Those who ask a question, are stupid for 30 seconds. Those who never ask, are stupid for life.

 
OP  1/23/13 7:25:20 PM#2

and since I kind of assume that someone will go "and whats the point of this thread"

 

well, I've seen an increase in news (on official news websites, and gaming websites) and what not about online relations. So figured I should be hip and up to date about these things :P

 

Online relations are way better today, than in previous years. Again, simply because of so many ways to know if the person is actually lying or not. Its exactly like real life really...I've met great people online, and I've met horrid people in real life...likewise, I've been played online...and I've met great people in real life. But skype, calling person on phone, facebook (still need skype, don't rely on facebook only)...a whole mix of things...its exactly like meeting someone in real life. The person online can be lying, the person in real life (like my literally psycho ex-gf) can be lying. 

 

So really, online and offline...both the same. In some ways, online is even better in how easy it is to meet people with similar interests...and if they refuse to skype and show their real identity and refuse to let them call you (likewise the same goes for you for them)...time to pick up and move on. 

Isabella and Laenaya are on Photobucket!

http://s4.photobucket.com/user/Vendayn/library/Skyrim/Anime%20Skyrim

My (mostly) scenery screenshots of heavily modded Skyrim

http://s4.photobucket.com/user/Vendayn/library/Skyrim/Anime%20Skyrim/Aesthetics

  GrayImpact

Hard Core Member

Joined: 11/03/08
Posts: 888

1/24/13 12:45:30 AM#3

I don't think theres anything wrong with them, but you should definitely meet early on.

If It's cross country or anything like that, I'd say chances are pretty high the relationship will amount to nothing.

  adenostar

Novice Member

Joined: 1/20/13
Posts: 13

1/24/13 3:34:38 AM#4

It depends on the people involved, what they're looking to get out of it, and how well they deal with distance. My boyfriend and I are currently in an online relationship (for now) because distance is a huge factor. I'm in the US, hes in the UK. But we've known each other for 10 years and met up and spent at least a week together several years back. Circumstances prevented us from dating back then (I was married at the time), but we started dating May of last year, and we're currently working on getting money saved up for visits and stuff.

Online relationships can work well for some people but less so for others. I've always been the type to go for online things first (I met my ex husband online too), because I'm terrible at meeting people offline. Theres nothing wrong with me and I tend to get hit on a lot, but I'm a shy, anti-social nerd with anxiety issues, so trying to meet people in an offline setting is extremely nerve wrecking for me. Its much easier to find like minded people online that I can share interests and things with.

Some people want to make online dating sound bad, like everyone you meet could really be a crazed maniac... but, that can be said for anyone, whether you meet them online or not. Your neighbor could be a crazed maniac. The guy that bags your groceries at the store could be a crazed maniac. That cute guy/girl you met at the bar the other night could also be a crazed maniac. Personally, I don't think the risks are any higher whether its online or not. 

There are always risks involved when meeting someone new, online or offline. The only thing a person can do is be as careful as they can and not go rushing into anything at random. And if a person wants to give online relationships a chance, then they need a lot of patience, because long distance isn't easy.

  rpg_gunner

Novice Member

Joined: 12/20/12
Posts: 75

"Disasterrific!"

1/24/13 11:28:24 PM#5
There are a lot of scams that I know of. Many people have been scammed by people online pretending to be a hot female or rich manly man.
  adenostar

Novice Member

Joined: 1/20/13
Posts: 13

1/25/13 12:01:59 AM#6
Originally posted by rpg_gunner
There are a lot of scams that I know of. Many people have been scammed by people online pretending to be a hot female or rich manly man.

Well, the biggest problem there is the people that specifically look for those things. If you're just looking for someone because they're hot and/or rich... theres something wrong there. At least in my opinion. Granted, it doesn't exuse the people that scam others, but seriously, theres way more to relationships than just looks and money.

 

  MediBlast

Novice Member

Joined: 2/05/13
Posts: 37

2/12/13 5:10:58 AM#7
I think online relationship is really not the ideal relationship of anyone unless your keeping something. or you are not really paris hilton or whoever you potray  hahaha!
  Dexter2010

Novice Member

Joined: 7/15/12
Posts: 153

2/12/13 3:26:20 PM#8
Everyone online is imaginary and don't exist. You can't cuddle/kiss/etc. online.
  CalmOceans

Elite Member

Joined: 5/06/11
Posts: 1908

2/12/13 5:16:02 PM#9

I usually get creeped out by anyone who wants anything more online than just talking to me.

"I'm in Europe on the week-end, mind if I come over?"

WAIT WHAT, YES I MIND, I like you, but I don't like you THAT much. Online is online, I don't want you in my house! You don't even live in my country or speak my language.

 

At that point I'm furiously looking over the info I gave online just to make sure that person does not have my address and rings on our doorbell in the middle of the night and my partner goes "who the hell is that?'

"it's some guy who flew ten thousand miles from the US to say hi, don't worry, it's nothing serious"

 

It's not that I flirt online but you can talk to some guys from the other side of the world in MMO and the next thing you know they are ready to take the first plane to have your children.

Good lord, go to your local library instead and find a girl there who speaks your language and actually lives in your area, please, she will be far more interested in you than someone you just met online at random. Why do guys like that complicate things so much.

I think some people take online relationships way too serious.

 

  StonesDK

Hard Core Member

Joined: 8/06/11
Posts: 1845

2/12/13 7:48:35 PM#10
Originally posted by CalmOceans

I usually get creeped out by anyone who wants anything more online than just talking to me.

"I'm in Europe on the week-end, mind if I come over?"

WAIT WHAT, YES I MIND, I like you, but I don't like you THAT much. Online is online, I don't want you in my house! You don't even live in my country or speak my language.

 

At that point I'm furiously looking over the info I gave online just to make sure that person does not have my address and rings on our doorbell in the middle of the night and my partner goes "who the hell is that?'

"it's some guy who flew ten thousand miles from the US to say hi, don't worry, it's nothing serious"

 

It's not that I flirt online but you can talk to some guys from the other side of the world in MMO and the next thing you know they are ready to take the first plane to have your children.

Good lord, go to your local library instead and find a girl there who speaks your language and actually lives in your area, please, she will be far more interested in you than someone you just met online at random. Why do guys like that complicate things so much.

I think some people take online relationships way too serious.

 

There's a lot of lonely MMO gamers out there that takes any interest from a female gamer as a sign of romantic interest. It's quite sad really

  Zindaihas

Novice Member

Joined: 5/07/06
Posts: 5109

'If you put govt in charge of the Sahara Desert, in 5 yrs there'd be a shortage of sand'~M. Friedman

2/12/13 10:43:26 PM#11
I've been trapped in an online relationship for 3 years now and no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to get out of it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tK6YIAX1jg

  Imst

Apprentice Member

Joined: 12/13/12
Posts: 2

2/12/13 10:55:38 PM#12

For me, I really don't like this kind of set up for a relationship. Casual yes, but for serious relationship. I don't think skype will do for me as a part of communication and a way to see my partner. It's like a Long Distance Relationship (LDR) but he/she lives a few blocks away why not?

The factor that I thought about online relationship was Trust. Do you really trust him or her that he/she is telling the truth or he/she is not with someone else while having an online relationship with you? That are some of the questions that will be on your mind whenever you close or move away on Skype. Just my 2cents

  pmw4friend

Novice Member

Joined: 2/09/13
Posts: 62

even though all the adds might be against you, giving up is not an option.

2/13/13 8:31:52 AM#13
Those 2 questions are for online and. Offline. Do you really trust the person him/her online or offline? (Because almost everyone cheats). It does not matter of tthe telationship is offline or online as long as both partners trust each other and have a great time when together or pn skype.....
  rpg_gunner

Novice Member

Joined: 12/20/12
Posts: 75

"Disasterrific!"

2/13/13 10:26:43 PM#14
IF THERES A WAY FOR BOTH OF YOU TALK USING WEBCAMS, SKYPE. I THINK THERE WILL BE NO PROBLEM, ATLEAST YOU CAN SAY THAT PERSON IS NOT FAKING YOU... BUT I THINK ITS STILL HARD BECAUSE THERES A BIG CHANCE THAT THERE IS A BIG LIE BEHIND IT.
  adenostar

Novice Member

Joined: 1/20/13
Posts: 13

2/13/13 11:20:49 PM#15

I've always preferred online relationships to offline ones. I mean, its fine if an online one becomes an offline one, but to start out I prefer them online. As I said in my last post, I met my ex-husband online. We knew each other online for about two years, and ended up married for almost five.

 

It doesn't work for everyone though. For me theres more fear and apprehension when it comes to offline relationships. I can't explain it (other than to say that I'm painfully shy and barely even leave my house most of the time unless I have to), but its harder for me to trust people offline most of the time. I have trouble trusting people online too, unless I've known them for many years, but its worse offline.

 

I suppose that sorta makes me sound like some kind of paranoid recluse or something. Reclusive... possibly. Paranoid, not really. I've just been hurt and bullied and treated like crap so much by people "in real life". Its very hard for me to find people I have stuff in common with offline. Its so much easier online. I can find entirely forums and communities full of people that share the same interests as me. I can connect with people in ways I can't offline.

 

I'm not saying I've never connected with people offline. I have a few very close friends offline, but thats it, and I've had those same friends for many, many years. But as far as romantic relationships go, I'd much rather meet someone online, because I have a better chance of finding someone I have something in common with. Theres no place to meet people in my town anyway, unless I want to go to a bar or something, and I'm not a bar person.

 

I think, in a way, I sometimes get a bit angry when people talk badly about online relationships, because I think if they were in my situation, they might feel differently. Stuck in a crappy town with very little options as far as meeting people goes.  In a situation like that, the only place you really can meet anyone is online.