Trending Games | ArcheAge | World of Warcraft | Destiny | Guild Wars 2

  Network:  FPSguru RTSguru
Login:  Password:   Remember?  
Show Quick Gamelist Jump to Random Game
Members:2,860,298 Users Online:0
Games:742  Posts:6,246,628
Recent forum postsRSS
Active threads
Cloud view
List all forums
General Forums
Developers Corner General Discussion
Popular Game Forums
Click a status to find game forum
Game Forums
Click a letter to find game forum
A-C
2029 Online 2112: Revolution 2Moons 4Story 8BitMMO 9 Dragons A Mystical Land A Tale in the Desert III A3 ACE Online ARGO Online Aberoth Absolute Force Online Absolute Terror Achaea Adellion Aerrevan Aetolia, the Midnight Age Age of Armor Age of Conan Age of Empires Online Age of Mourning Age of Wulin Age of Wushu Aida Arenas Aika Aion Albion Online Alganon All Points Bulletin (APB) Allods Online Altis Gates Amazing World Anarchy Online Ancients of Fasaria Andromeda 5 Angels Online Angry Birds Epic Anime Trumps Anmynor Anno Online Applo Arcane Hearts Arcane Legends ArchLord ArcheAge Archeblade Archlord X Ascend: Hand of Kul Asda 2 Asda Story Ashen Empires Asheron's Call Asheron's Call 2 Astera Online Astonia III Astro Empires Astro Lords: Oort CLoud Asura Force Atlantica Online Atriarch Aura Kingdom Aurora Blade Auto Assault Avatar Star Battle Dawn Battle Dawn Galaxies Battle for Graxia Battle of 3 Kingdoms Battle of the Immortals Battlecruiser Online Battlestar Galactica Online Battlestar Reloaded Beyond Protocol Black Aftermath Black Desert Black Gold Black Prophecy Black Prophecy Tactics: Nexus Conflict Blacklight Retribution Blade & Soul Blade Hunter Blade Wars Blazing Throne Bless Blitz 1941 Blood and Jade Bloodlines Champions Boot Hill Heroes Borderlands 2 Borderlands: The Pre-Sequel Bound by Flame Bounty Bay Online Brain Storm Bravada Bravely Default Bravely Second Brawl Busters. Brick-Force Bright Shadow Bullet Run Business Tycoon Online CTRacer Cabal Online Caesary Call of Camelot Call of Gods Call of Thrones Camelot Unchained Canaan Online Cardmon Hero Cartoon Universe CasinoRPG Cast & Conquer Castle Empire Castlot Celtic Heroes Champions Online Champions of Regnum Chaos Online Child of Light Chrono Tales Citadel of Sorcery CitiesXL Citizen Zero City of Decay City of Heroes City of Steam City of Transformers City of Villains Civilization Online Clan Lord Clash of Clans Cloud Nine Club Penguin Colony of War Command & Conquer: Tiberium Alliances Company of Heroes Online Conquer Online Conquer Online 3 Continent of the Ninth (C9) Core Blaze Core Exiles Corum Online Craft of Gods Crimecraft Crimelife 2 Cronous Crota II Crusaders of Solaris Cultures Online Cyber Monster 2 Céiron Wars
D-F
D&D Online DC Universe DK Online DOTA DOTA 2 DUST 514 DV8: Exile Dalethaan Dance Groove Online Dark Age of Camelot Dark Ages Dark Legends Dark Orbit Dark Relic: Prelude Dark Solstice Dark and Light DarkEden Online DarkSpace Darkblood Online Darkest Dungeon Darkfall Darkfall: Unholy Wars Darkwind: War on Wheels Das Tal Dawn of Fantasy Dawntide DayZ Dead Earth Dead Frontier Dead Island Dead Island 2 Dead Island: Riptide Deco Online Deepworld Defiance Deicide Online Dekaron Demons at the Horizon Desert Operations Destiny Diablo 3 Diamonin Digimon Battle Dino Storm Disciple Divergence Divina Divine Souls Divinity: Original Sin Dofus Dominus Online Dragon Age: Inquisition Dragon Ball Online Dragon Born Online Dragon Crusade Dragon Empires Dragon Eternity Dragon Nest Dragon Oath Dragon Pals Dragon Raja Dragon's Call Dragon's Call II Dragon's Prophet DragonSky DragonSoul Dragona Dragonica Dragons and Titans Drakengard 3 Dream of Mirror Online Dreamland Online Dreamlords: The Reawakening Drift City Duels Dungeon Blitz Dungeon Fighter Online Dungeon Overlord Dungeon Party Dungeon Rampage Dungeon Runners Dungeon of the Endless Dynastica Dynasty Warriors Online Dynasty of the Magi EIN (Epicus Incognitus) EVE Online Earth Eternal Earth and Beyond Earthrise Eclipse War Ecol Tactics Online Eden Eternal Edge of Space Einherjar - The Viking's Blood Elder Scrolls Online Eldevin Elf Online Elite: Dangerous Embers of Caerus Emil Chronicle Online Empire Empire & State Empire Craft Empire Universe 3 EmpireQuest Empires of Galldon End of Nations Endless Ages Endless Blue Moon Online Endless Online Entropia Universe EpicDuel Erebus: Travia Reborn Eredan Eternal Blade Eternal Lands Eternal Saga Ether Fields Ether Saga Online Eudemons Online EuroGangster EverEmber Online EverQuest Next EverQuest Online Adventures Evernight Everquest Everquest II Evony Exarch Exorace F.E.A.R. Online Face of Mankind Fairyland Online Fall of Rome Fallen Earth Fallen Sword Fallout Online Family Guy Online Fantage Fantasy Earth Zero Fantasy Realm Online Fantasy Tales Online Fantasy Worlds: Rhynn Faunasphere Faxion Online Fearless Fantasy Ferentus Ferion Fiesta Online Final Fantasy Type-0 HD Final Fantasy XI Final Fantasy XIV Final Fantasy XIV: A Realm Reborn Firefall Fists of Fu Florensia Flyff Football Manager Live Football Superstars Force of Arms Forge Forsaken World Fortnite Fortuna Forum for Discussion of Everlight Freaky Creatures Free Realms Freesky Online Freeworld Fung Wan Online Furcadia Fury Fusion Fall
G-L
GalaXseeds Galactic Command Online Game of Thrones: Seven Kingdoms Gameglobe Gate To Heavens Gates of Andaron Gatheryn Gauntlet Gekkeiju Online Ghost Online Ghost Recon Online Gladiatus Glitch Global Agenda Global Soccer Gloria Victis Glory of Gods GoGoRacer Goal Line Blitz Gods and Heroes GodsWar Online Golemizer Golf Star GoonZu Online Graal Kingdoms Granado Espada Online Grand Chase Grand Fantasia Grepolis Grimlands Guild Wars Guild Wars 2 Guild Wars Factions Guild Wars Nightfall H1Z1 Habbo Hotel Hailan Rising HaloSphere2 Haven & Hearth Hawken Heart Forth Alicia Hearthstone: Heroes of Warcraft Helbreath Hellgate Hellgate: London Hello Kitty Online Hero Online Hero Zero Hero's Journey Hero: 108 Online HeroSmash Heroes & Generals Heroes & Legends: Conquerors of Kolhar Heroes in the Sky Heroes of Bestia Heroes of Gaia Heroes of Might and Magic Online Heroes of Thessalonica Heroes of Three Kingdoms Heroes of the Storm Hex Holic Online Hostile Space Hunter Blade Huxley Icewind Dale: Enhanced Edition Illutia Illyriad Immortals USA Imperator Imperian Inferno Legend Infestation: Survivor Stories Infinite Crisis Infinity Infinity Iris Online Iron Grip: Marauders Irth Worlds Island Forge Islands of War Istaria: Chronicles of the Gifted Jade Dynasty Jagged Alliance Online Juggernaut Jumpgate Jumpgate Evolution KAL Online Kakele Online Kaos War Karos Online Kartuga Kicks Online King of Kings 3 Kingdom Heroes Kingdom Under Fire II Kingdom of Drakkar Kingory Kings and Legends Kings of the Realm KingsRoad Kitsu Saga Kiwarriors Knight Age Knight Online Knights of Dream City Kothuria Kung Foo! Kunlun Online Kyn L.A.W. LEGO Universe La Tale Land of Chaos Online Landmark Lands of Hope: Phoenix Edition LastChaos League of Angels League of Legends - Clash of Fates Legend of Edda: Vengeance Legend of Golden Plume Legend of Katha Legend of Mir 2 Legend of Mir 3 Legendary Champions Lego Minifigures Online Lichdom: Battlemage Life is Feudal Light of Nova Lime Odyssey Line of Defense Lineage Lineage Eternal: Twilight Resistance Lineage II Linkrealms Loong Online Lord of the Rings Online Lords Online Lords of the Fallen Lost Saga Lucent Heart Lunia Lusternia: Age of Ascension Luvinia World
M-Q
MU Online Mabinogi Maestia: Rise of Keledus MagiKnights Magic Barrage Magic World Online Manga Fighter MapleStory Martial Heroes Marvel Heroes Marvel Super Hero Squad Online Marvel: Avengers Alliance MechWarrior Online Megaten Meridian 59 : Evolution Merlin MetalMercs Metaplace Metin 2 MicroVolts Middle-earth: Shadow of Mordor Midkemia Online Might & Magic Heroes: Kingdoms MilMo Minecraft Mini Fighter Minions of Mirth Ministry of War Monato Esprit Monkey King Online Monkey Quest Monster & Me Monster Madness Online MonsterMMORPG Moonlight Online: Tales of Eternal Blood Moonrise Mordavia Mortal Online Mourning My Lands Myst Online: URU Live Myth Angels Online Myth War Myth War 2 Mytheon Mythic Saga Mythos N.E.O Online NIDA Online Nadirim Naviage: The Power of Capital Navy Field Need for Speed World Nemexia Neo's Land NeoSteam Neocron Nether Neverwinter Nexus: The Kingdom Of The Winds NinjaTrick NosTale Novus Aeterno Oberin Odin Quest Odyssey RPG Ogre Island Omerta 3 Online Boxing Manager Onverse Order & Chaos Online Order of Magic Original Blood Origins Return Origins of Malu Orion's Belt Otherland Forums OverSoul Overkings Oz Online Oz World Pandora Saga Pantheon: Rise of the Fallen Panzar Parabellum Parallel Kingdom Parfait Station Path of Exile Pathfinder Online Perfect World Perpetuum Online Persona V Phantasy Star Online 2 Phantasy Star Universe Phoenix Dynasty Online Phylon Pi Story Picaroon Pirate Galaxy Pirate Storm Pirate101 PirateKing Online Pirates of the Burning Sea Pirates of the Caribbean Online Pixie Hollow Planeshift Planet Arkadia Planet Calypso PlanetSide 2 Planetside Planets³ Playboy Manager Pocket Legends Pockie Ninja Pockie Pirates Pockie Saints PoxNora Prime World Prime: Battle for Dominus Priston Tale Priston Tale II Prius Online Project Blackout Project Powder Project Titan Forums Project Wiki Project Zomboid Puzzle Pirates Quest for Infamy Quickhit Football
R-S
R2 Online RAN Online RF Online ROSE Online Rage of 3 Kingdoms Ragnarok Online Ragnarok Online II RaiderZ Rakion Rappelz RappelzSEA Ravenmarch Realm Fighter Realm of the Mad God Realm of the Titans Realms Online Reclamation Red Stone Red War: Edem's Curse Regnum Online Remnant Knights Renaissance Repulse Requiem: Memento Mori Rift RiotZone Rise Rise of Dragonian Era Rise of Empire Rise of the Tycoon Risen 3: Titan Lords Rising of King Risk Your Life Rivality Rockfree Rohan: Blood Feud Role Play Worlds Roll n Rock Roma Victor Romadoria Rosh Online Roto X Rubies of Eventide Ruin Online Rumble Fighter Runes of Magic Runescape Rust Rusty Hearts Ryzom S4 League SAGA SD Gundam Capsule Fighter Online SMITE SUN Sacred 3 Sagramore Salem SaySayGirls Scarlet Blade Scions of Fate Seal Online: Evolution Second Chance Heroes Second Life Secret of the Solstice Seed Serenia Fantasy Seven Seas Saga Seven Souls Online Sevencore Shadow Realms Shadow of Legend Shadowbane Shadowrun Online Shaiya Shards Online Shattered Galaxy Sho Online Shot Online Shroud of the Avatar SideQuest Siege on Stars Sigonyth: Desert Eternity Silkroad Online Skyblade Skyforge SmashMuck Champions Smoo Online Soldier Front Soul Master Soul Order Online Soul of Guardian Space Heroes Universe Sparta: War of Empires Spellcasters Sphere Spiral Knights Spirit Tales Splash Fighters Squad Wars Star Citizen Star Sonata 2 Star Stable Star Supremacy Star Trek Online Star Trek: Infinite Space Star Wars Galaxies Star Wars: Clone Wars Adventures Star Wars: The Old Republic StarQuest Online Stargate Worlds Starlight Story Starpires State of Decay SteelWar Online Stone Age 2 Stormfall: Age of War Storybricks Stronghold Kingdoms Styx: Master of Shadows Sudden Attack Supremacy 1914 Supreme Destiny Sword Girls Sword of Destiny: Rise of Aions SwordX Swords of Heavens Swordsman
T-Z
TERA TS Online Tabula Rasa Tactica Online Tales Runner Tales of Fantasy Tales of Pirates Tales of Pirates II Tales of Solaris Talisman Online Tamer Saga Tank Ace Tantra Online Tatsumaki: Land at War Terra Militaris TerraWorld Online Thang Online The 4th Coming The Agency The Aurora World The Banner Saga The Black Watchmen The Chronicle The Chronicles of Spellborn The Crew The Division The Hammers End The Incredible Adventures of Van Helsing The Incredible Adventures of Van Helsing 2 The Legend of Ares The Lost Titans The Matrix Online The Mighty Quest for Epic Loot The Missing Ink The Mummy Online The Myth of Soma The Pride of Taern The Realm Online The Repopulation The Secret World The Sims Online The Strategems The West The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt Theralon There Therian Saga Thrones of Chaos Tibia Tibia Micro Edition Tiger Knight Titan Siege Titans of Time Toontown Online Top Speed Topia Online Torchlight Total Domination Transformers Universe Transistor Transverse Traveller AR Travia Online Travian Trials of Ascension Tribal Hero Tribal Wars Tribes Universe Trickster Online Trove Troy Online True Fantasy Live Online Turf Battles Twelve Sky Twelve Sky 2 Twilight War Tynon U.B. Funkeys UFO Online URDEAD Online Ultima Forever: Quest for the Avatar Ultima Online Ultima X: Odyssey Ultimate Naruto Ultimate Soccer Boss Uncharted Waters Online Undercover 2: Merc Wars Underlight Unification Wars Universe Online Utopia Valkyrie Sky Vampire Lord Online Vanguard: Saga of Heroes Vanquish Space Vector City Racers Vendetta Online Victory - Age of Racing Vindictus Virtonomics Vis Gladius Visions of Zosimos VoidExpanse Voyage Century Online W.E.L.L. Online WAR (Warhammer Online) WAR2 Glory WYD Global Wakfu War Thunder War of 2012 War of Angels War of Legends War of Mercenaries War of Thrones War of the Immortals WarFlow Waren Story Wargame1942 Warhammer 40,000: Eternal Crusade Warhammer 40K: Dark Millennium Online Warhammer Online: Wrath of Heroes Warkeepers Warrior Epic Wartune Wasteland 2 WebLords Wild West Online WildStar Wind of Luck WindSlayer 2 Wings of Destiny Wish Wizard101 Wizardry Online Wizards and Champions Wonder King Wonderland Online World Golf Tour World of Battles World of Darkness World of Heroes World of Kung Fu World of Pirates World of Speed World of Tanks World of Tanks Generals World of Warcraft World of Warplanes World of Warships World of the Living Dead WorldAlpha Wurm Online Xenoblade Chronicles: X Xenocell Xiah Xsyon Xulu YS Online Yitien ZU Online Zentia Zero Online Zero Online: The Andromeda Crisis Zodiac Online Zombies Ate My Pizza eRepublik

MMORPG.com Discussion Forums

General Discussion

General Discussion 

The Pub at MMORPG.COM  » How do you deal with gamers with personal problems?

5 Pages « 1 2 3 4 5 » Search
85 posts found
  GeezerGamer

Elite Member

Joined: 4/03/12
Posts: 4782

10/09/12 5:59:29 PM#61
Originally posted by Jemcrystal

Lucidia:  "Hi, Guildmate Death_Luv, my name is Lucidia and I'd like to party with you in Wiley Canyon.  Oh, btw, my two-yr-old and I are about to get evicted because we can't pay rent."  

Death_Luv:  "Ah, errr, how bout them Dodgers?"

 

How do you deal with mmo peeps unloading personal baggage in game?

 

 

*[Made up names but the situation is vague copy from a encounter I had yesterday].

/ignore

It's the sad state of the genre. The next big title has as many threads discussing issues with it's business model than issues with the game itself.

  Tokken

Elite Member

Joined: 3/06/04
Posts: 901

"I'm your Huckleberry!"

10/09/12 6:54:47 PM#62
have counseling resources available if the need arrises.

UO, EQ, DAoC, SWG, WOW, EQ2, CoH, CoX, VG, Aion, STO, CO, DCUO, LOTRO, Tera, SWTOR, GW2, DP, NW, TSW, MH, DDO, Rift, WS, ESO, Trove, LM

  loulaki

Apprentice Member

Joined: 12/20/11
Posts: 810

10/10/12 7:31:14 AM#63
well from my personall experience there are 2 kind of personal life problems unloaded in game
 
the first kind of problems are from those who in purpose expresssing them, there my reaction is to give an advise or change the theme, its an MMO and some people wanna express their problems/feelings not to an NPC but to someone else... if you raise wall against them go play singleplay. of course drama queens not included :P
 
the second kind of problems which occurs in the way are accidentaly, i have example 2 days before, i was in party and one was not typing just following like a bot, thanks to my luck i didnt said anything offfensive (as i do usually) cause when i asked if he was ok, his friend send me whisper that his friends has a mind "problem" something like alexia if i remember, ok this personal life problem expressed without purpose, my personal stance is just to make a neutral joke just to relax the atmosphaire and continue in gaming : )
 
dont be harsh to those who have problem next to you, you dont wanna this to happen to you too .

  Nazlokless

Novice Member

Joined: 8/10/10
Posts: 6

10/10/12 7:38:49 AM#64

to be fair i would be asking why they investing time money on a game, burning electricity ect, when they cannot afford rent. You should have told them to sell their computer to pay the rent. That two year old child is more important than a game tbh.

 

  Icewhite

Made History

Joined: 7/11/11
Posts: 6495

Pink, it's like red but not quite.

10/10/12 7:57:10 AM#65
Originally posted by Jemcrystal
How do you deal with mmo peeps unloading personal baggage in game?

The same way I deal with them on forums.

Hear the crickets chirping?

Self-pity imprisons us in the walls of our own self-absorption. The whole world shrinks down to the size of our problem, and the more we dwell on it, the smaller we are and the larger the problem seems to grow.

  Lienhart

Novice Member

Joined: 5/21/07
Posts: 673

10/10/12 8:30:11 AM#66

Read half of the responses here and you'll see just what the fuck is wrong with Western society.

Me, myself and I.

  jayarte

Novice Member

Joined: 8/21/09
Posts: 450

10/10/12 9:37:46 AM#67
Originally posted by Lawlmonster

I think everyone deserves help, regardless if you're face to face, on the phone, or using the internet: that's still a real person on the other end. Compassion doesn't make us weak, either. From my own experiences and tribulations, I can affirm that ventrilo and friends I've known for roughly fifteen years were the reason I sought medical and therapeutic aide, though I probably wouldn't have discussed my problems with strangers. People handle loss and conflict in different ways. Maybe the individual private messaging ol' Death_Luv had no one else to speak with, or couldn't fully confide in someone they already knew? Naturally, they should probably seek appropriate help, and the compassionate response would be to offer some form of comfort or advice.

 

Sure, we've all got problems. No one really wants to spend their free time listening to other people bitch about their issues, but simply being polite, honest, or compassionate toward their situation could make all of the difference, with the added bonus of feeling good about what you've done.

Well said.  I was thinking a very similar thing.  What a bunch of hard-hearted posters above, very depressing.  

 

Of course, a balance needs to be struck: we don't want to be logging into a game and spending the whole time every time listening to people discuss their problems, but when someone is struggling in real life and reaches out to another player to talk about that, would it really hurt to listen for a while?  We all have problems of varying degrees and some of us like to talk about them, and some don't.  For those who don't, though, I'd just say please show a little compassion when someone does.  Giving 5 or 10 minutes of your time and attention  might make a massive difference to someone who is really on the edge.  Surely that should be more important than achieving some virtual goal in a game?  Some people might have nobody else to confide in, or they might find it easier to do in the anonymity of an mmo.  A little kindness goes a long way ♥

  jayarte

Novice Member

Joined: 8/21/09
Posts: 450

10/10/12 9:38:58 AM#68
Originally posted by Wakygreek
I like to hear about real life and tbh I wish people were more open about that kind of stuff. While gaming is primarily used for entertainment, I feel it is equally useful as a way to reach out to other people that also share the same hobby.

Also this.

  Nitth

Elite Member

Joined: 7/29/10
Posts: 3306

Magic Propels my Rolly Chair.

10/10/12 9:38:58 AM#69


Originally posted by bunnyhopper
Gank them and loot their stuffz.

Sorry had to laugh!


TSW - AoC - Aion - WOW - EVE - Fallen Earth - Co - Rift - || XNA C# Java Development

  loulaki

Apprentice Member

Joined: 12/20/11
Posts: 810

10/10/12 10:23:57 AM#70
Originally posted by jayarte
Originally posted by Lawlmonster

I think everyone deserves help, regardless if you're face to face, on the phone, or using the internet: that's still a real person on the other end. Compassion doesn't make us weak, either. From my own experiences and tribulations, I can affirm that ventrilo and friends I've known for roughly fifteen years were the reason I sought medical and therapeutic aide, though I probably wouldn't have discussed my problems with strangers. People handle loss and conflict in different ways. Maybe the individual private messaging ol' Death_Luv had no one else to speak with, or couldn't fully confide in someone they already knew? Naturally, they should probably seek appropriate help, and the compassionate response would be to offer some form of comfort or advice.

 

Sure, we've all got problems. No one really wants to spend their free time listening to other people bitch about their issues, but simply being polite, honest, or compassionate toward their situation could make all of the difference, with the added bonus of feeling good about what you've done.

Well said.  I was thinking a very similar thing.  What a bunch of hard-hearted posters above, very depressing.  

 

Of course, a balance needs to be struck: we don't want to be logging into a game and spending the whole time every time listening to people discuss their problems, but when someone is struggling in real life and reaches out to another player to talk about that, would it really hurt to listen for a while?  We all have problems of varying degrees and some of us like to talk about them, and some don't.  For those who don't, though, I'd just say please show a little compassion when someone does.  Giving 5 or 10 minutes of your time and attention  might make a massive difference to someone who is really on the edge.  Surely that should be more important than achieving some virtual goal in a game?  Some people might have nobody else to confide in, or they might find it easier to do in the anonymity of an mmo.  A little kindness goes a long way ♥

thanks god posts like these makes me believe that i am alone yet ..!

 

so much hatred and frozen feelings from the posters in this community, and then they worry about the MMOs that they are not social ... how ironic, i will keep the link of that thread everytime i read that an MMO isnt social enough.

  Sovrath

Elite Member

Joined: 1/06/05
Posts: 17242

10/10/12 10:34:23 AM#71
Originally posted by Mueslinator
Originally posted by Simphanatic

The sorry truth is there are many people who depend on online games for their primary source of human interaction. Often, this is a self-imposed circumstance, but I'm acquainted with a number of hardcore players who've disabilities (myself included) and find getting out of the house and socializing a somewhat insurmountable challenge.

Still, there's a time and place for everything. Were the player characterized by the OP a total stranger, I'd find it an uncomfortable conversation and would do my utmost to disengage. Contrariwise, if the player was someone with whom I'd become friendly, I might lend an ear and support or advice within my purview.

I'm certainly not bereft of empathy, but at the same time I tend to be a no-nonsense kind of player. When I'm engaged in a quest or group mission, I don't want to be bothered by chit chat that doesn't concern the game or specific matters at hand. One of the principal reasons I seek out MMOs is for their immersive quality -- call it escapism. I don't burden others with my real life issues and, generally, I'd much prefer they not burden me with theirs.

 

Seconded.

It absolutely depends on who is coming to me with which personal problems:

A stranger with an immediate, serious problem? Very uncomfortable - I will try to disengage from the conversation as soon as possible. Maybe even contact a GM, if the person sounds like he/she needs real help.

A stranger with a 'problem'? Disengage, make it clear I have no interest in other peoples' personal life. If they persist, /ignore.

A gaming buddy with a real problem? I'll try my best to help, but will make it clear that he should seek outside help, if applicable. And that I won't be there every time to help out.

A friend? They know me well enough to not bother me with those things in-game. If they need to talk, we'll meet up IRL.

 

That said: I play to escape reality for a bit. Contrary to what some might believe, escapism (in measure) is normal, healthy behaviour that helps keep us level. When I play, I don't particularly want to hear about RL: Be that someone's warts acting up, someone's RL interrupting a play session repeatedly, the latest soccer game or the financial crisis. I want to game - to talk about the game I'm playing, discuss Lore, gameplay, the game itself.

I'll third that (unless someone else has done that already).

It's poor form to unburden yourself to a stranger and essentially disrupt the game by going off on your worldy woes.

The only  way I can see it working is if you've played with this person  for a long time and know them well and want to seek their advice or if you, as an aside, say "hey, I realize this might be weird but can I ask some advice..."

In which case one party can give advice and the other party can thank them and move on to the game.

the problem with some people is that if they receive advice they don't heed it or even acknowledge it but just go on in the muck that is their life.

Case in point, the person who I had spoken to who was unemployed, in a bad financial place, bad relationship etc.

I gave advice on how to get a job and all they wanted to do was bitch and even worse, make excuses for why they couldn't do what I suggested. Which really were excuses as I counteracted every one of them.

I don't get paid to be an online thereapist and I do pay to play online games.

 

  nariusseldon

Elite Member

Joined: 12/21/07
Posts: 19849

10/10/12 11:02:07 AM#72
Originally posted by Lienhart

Read half of the responses here and you'll see just what the fuck is wrong with Western society.

Me, myself and I.

"wrong"? Just a way of life. Don't expect handouts from strangers.

And we are talking about entertainment here. If you need help, call up the Red Cross. Don't expect it in a GAME.

  Jemcrystal

Hard Core Member

Joined: 1/02/08
Posts: 1347

Let em put a slave ring thru u're nose u're prob not going to like where they're taking you. Think.

 
OP  10/10/12 11:40:54 AM#73
Originally posted by Nazlokless

to be fair i would be asking why they investing time money on a game, burning electricity ect, when they cannot afford rent. You should have told them to sell their computer to pay the rent. That two year old child is more important than a game tbh.

 

 

Because it takes money to make money and some people get caught unawares.  You can't put an ad in the paper to sell when you are completely broke - no money for the add silly.  You may be broke because you had an unexpected visit to the hospital or car trouble.  Heck, my sister and her husband are stretched now because they are making enough money to not be edible for Medicare (government aid).  They can not afford to pay their bills because they make more money than ever.  With four kids the government owned school system has begun charging them full price for each one's education.  Unexpected things can happen that put you in a financial bind.  Death, cancer, etc, etc, etc.  You might have already had a computer and game set up before poop hit.  It might be an old PC and not sellable and not worth the add in the paper.  

Unless you've hit bottom yourself and HAD NO HELP FROM ANYONE to climb out you have no right to judge.

That said, I still feel games are not the place to seek help.  Games are a momentary escape from stress, yeah, but don't ask strangers for help.  Get involved in a church if you don't have family or your family is bent.  If the church don't help dump them and find another.  Don't do church, join a biker club.  But don't ask online gamers because they can't help and you waste time you could have asked someone who could.

And PC's don't burn that much electricity if you don't turn them off and on or run a special designed gamers PC.  It's the internet / tv bill you might cancel which also might not be a good idea if your are looking for a job real quick.  Google [Earth] is a great way map out a job interview or read up on a business your scooping out to impress a would be boss. 

http://s25.postimg.org/e4cys86xb/gw004.jpg

  sacredfool

Hard Core Member

Joined: 5/04/07
Posts: 714

10/10/12 11:48:02 AM#74

I reply with something slightly mean and sarcastic like:

"Well, hopefully you will have net at your new place so you can continue playing. :\ "

 

If they get annoyed and leave good, if it makes them shut up it's good and if they are willing to deal with it I might even be willing to give them some real advice. 


Originally posted by nethaniah

Seriously Farmville? Yeah I think it's great. In a World where half our population is dying of hunger the more fortunate half is spending their time harvesting food that doesn't exist.


  TwoThreeFour

Novice Member

Joined: 3/26/12
Posts: 2148

10/10/12 12:02:24 PM#75
Originally posted by Simphanatic
Originally posted by Disatisfied9
Originally posted by Simphanatic

The most valuable member of any guild is always named Google, he's also the least used member, especially by the takers.

I hate people like you. You know, the jerks who say "google it" as if that's a real answer.

And, not to put too fine a point on it, I have no time for people who lack the initiative and resourcefulness to solve life's simplest problems without having their hands held at every turn.

Yeah, I'm judgmental. I'm the kind of person who reads through a game's forum and user guides before I start playing a game. When I have a question, it's definitely easier for me to find an answer via Google (3 minutes tops) than to bother other players with petty questions they've already answered ad nauseum.

I believe new players should be given the tools to succeed, part of that is helping them know where to find answers; so the next time they are stumped and no guildmate is online they know how to handle it.

I most certainly believe that spoonfeeding people only cripples them.

Case in point:

New player asks which mob drops leather. Guild members tell him.

Ten minutes later same player asks which mob drobs a needle and thread. Guild members tell him.

Another ten minutes pass when the new player asks what mobs drop gold darts. Guild members tell him.

And so it continues.

Whereas, had a guildmate given the new member a URL for the games Wiki, the new member would not only know where to look up such items, he'd also discover an entire universe of useful information.

Unlike you, I don't actually hate anyone, but I have absolutely no respect for the intellectually lazy types who haven't the inclination to help themselves. Frankly, they should stay on the Disney site.

 

Just for the record: google and wiki is spoonfeeding. Those who are not spoonfed learn through their own analysis and experience. 

  TwoThreeFour

Novice Member

Joined: 3/26/12
Posts: 2148

10/10/12 12:09:54 PM#76
Originally posted by Jemcrystal
(...)

 

To either I want to be polite but I don't want to hand feed them so they'll keep dishing stress.  Seriously, THERE IS NOTHING A GUILDMATE CAN DO TO SAVE YOU FROM LIFE'S PROBLEMS.  

 

Actually, just making them believe that you care for at least a moment, may be enough to brighten their day. I don't think anyone demands other people to care or to listen, but I would be suprised if they don't appriciate that at least someone listens for a while even though they cannot do much to help other than listening temporarily.

  Sovrath

Elite Member

Joined: 1/06/05
Posts: 17242

10/10/12 12:42:58 PM#77
Originally posted by TwoThreeFour
Originally posted by Jemcrystal
(...)

 

To either I want to be polite but I don't want to hand feed them so they'll keep dishing stress.  Seriously, THERE IS NOTHING A GUILDMATE CAN DO TO SAVE YOU FROM LIFE'S PROBLEMS.  

 

Actually, just making them believe that you care for at least a moment, may be enough to brighten their day. I don't think anyone demands other people to care or to listen, but I would be suprised if they don't appriciate that at least someone listens for a while even though they cannot do much to help other than listening temporarily.

That's all well and good but in my experience what happens is you then become their listening post all the time.

I used to be a patient and supportive Guild Leader with some really good people. We had a few people who had quite a few issues and I ended up being the default supportive ear.

Instead of them addressing their issues it became a "session" every day.

At some point it really is the responsibility of the affected individual to seek real help. Or at the very least recognize boundaries and don't constantly dump on people.

  phantomghost

Novice Member

Joined: 11/05/11
Posts: 635

"Kill me, my man kills you, that's how you lose."

10/10/12 12:49:33 PM#78
Originally posted by Lienhart

Read half of the responses here and you'll see just what the fuck is wrong with Western society.

Me, myself and I.

Whats wrong is the person trying to make somebody feel bad for them.  I know I do not play games because I want to hear about somebody elses problems.

 

I especially do not want to hear about somebody with no self motivation and a lack of priorites crying about their struggles.

"I see they watchin' me and takin' notes on my moves, Run up on me it's all I want I ain't got nothin' to lose."

  Lienhart

Novice Member

Joined: 5/21/07
Posts: 673

10/10/12 6:24:51 PM#79
Originally posted by nariusseldon
Originally posted by Lienhart

Read half of the responses here and you'll see just what the fuck is wrong with Western society.

Me, myself and I.

"wrong"? Just a way of life. Don't expect handouts from strangers.

And we are talking about entertainment here. If you need help, call up the Red Cross. Don't expect it in a GAME.

You know this is why you'll never move from your current position of life? lol

Empathy goes a long way; especially when trying to get laid.

  Lienhart

Novice Member

Joined: 5/21/07
Posts: 673

10/10/12 6:30:35 PM#80
Originally posted by phantomghost
Originally posted by Lienhart

Read half of the responses here and you'll see just what the fuck is wrong with Western society.

Me, myself and I.

Whats wrong is the person trying to make somebody feel bad for them.  I know I do not play games because I want to hear about somebody elses problems.

 

I especially do not want to hear about somebody with no self motivation and a lack of priorites crying about their struggles.

My gf low sided today on her motorcycle and multiple cars passed by her without asking if she was okay. The issue isn't exclusive to MMORPGs; it's everywhere. There are case studies of rape victims being dragged into the middle of an intersection and left to die; nobody gave a shit (bystander effect). Look at vehicle theft videos on YouTube, someone using a hacksaw in a damn major intersection in New York to steal somoene's bicycle, nobody attemped to stop him (in broad daylight).

This is culture specific and it plays a large part of the Western "civilized" society. If you selfish shits can't do this in a video game, you sure as hell aren't going to do it in real life.

Here's a story that relates to this topic and shows that there's at least a BIT of hope:

http://www.zenmoments.org/the-cab-ride-ill-never-forget/

5 Pages « 1 2 3 4 5 » Search