Lucidia:  "Hi, Guildmate Death_Luv, my name is Lucidia and I'd like to party with you in Wiley Canyon.  Oh, btw, my two-yr-old and I are about to get evicted because we can't pay rent."  

Death_Luv:  "Ah, errr, how bout them Dodgers?"

How do you deal with mmo peeps unloading personal baggage in game?

*[Made up names but the situation is vague copy from a encounter I had yesterday].

sounds to me like a random grp request?then telling u her/his problems? i just say ignore :P

if they are friends.. well then thats ur call

/block

Have enough personal problems and can't really be bothered by those of an other ...sorry...

Originally posted by Jemcrystal

Lucidia:  "Hi, Guildmate Death_Luv, my name is Lucidia and I'd like to party with you in Wiley Canyon.  Oh, btw, my two-yr-old and I are about to get evicted because we can't pay rent."  

Death_Luv:  "Ah, errr, how bout them Dodgers?"

 

How do you deal with mmo peeps unloading personal baggage in game?

 

 

*[Made up names but the situation is vague copy from a encounter I had yesterday].

I don't. I generally don't engage them in conversation. The one time I did, a person who was unemployed, had issues, etc, I ended up giving advice and they just acknowledged it and then kept going on about how they didn't know what to do.

If I get people who have issues or who are hitting on me I generally finish up the party  as quickly as possible and move on.

If there is a goal I then end the party after we obtain the goal. if it's just a leveling party I will do a few quests with them and then tell them I have to go.

I think everyone deserves help, regardless if you're face to face, on the phone, or using the internet: that's still a real person on the other end. Compassion doesn't make us weak, either. From my own experiences and tribulations, I can affirm that ventrilo and friends I've known for roughly fifteen years were the reason I sought medical and therapeutic aide, though I probably wouldn't have discussed my problems with strangers. People handle loss and conflict in different ways. Maybe the individual private messaging ol' Death_Luv had no one else to speak with, or couldn't fully confide in someone they already knew? Naturally, they should probably seek appropriate help, and the compassionate response would be to offer some form of comfort or advice.

Sure, we've all got problems. No one really wants to spend their free time listening to other people bitch about their issues, but simply being polite, honest, or compassionate toward their situation could make all of the difference, with the added bonus of feeling good about what you've done.

I'd say offer the best advice you can, once.  Then maybe nicely say that you don't think a game is the proper place for that conversation, and strangers aren't always the best people to ask for advice.

Also, the way the post is written, it sounds more like "woe is me!" and I want attention for it rather than truly asking for advice.  In that case, I'd probably just /block.

I not seen many instances of this, it is usually somebody seeking attention, and seaking to rid you of cash.  I actually seen officers kick folks out of the guild when they start acting like this.

Honestly when I see it I offer advice then if they keep going with it I tune them out with the ignore function. 

Some folks need help, some folks want attentionn, you never know until you talk to them.

Edit in addendum to this if somebody tells me they are fixing to be homeless but still play a game, I have to tell them. Hey budy you got your priorities of of wack.  

Originally posted by Jemcrystal

Lucidia:  "Hi, Guildmate Death_Luv, my name is Lucidia and I'd like to party with you in Wiley Canyon.  Oh, btw, my two-yr-old and I are about to get evicted because we can't pay rent."  

Death_Luv:  "Ah, errr, how bout them Dodgers?"

 

How do you deal with mmo peeps unloading personal baggage in game?

 

 

*[Made up names but the situation is vague copy from a encounter I had yesterday].

i don't. Just quite the group. Or put them on ignore. If i want to be a shrink, i will go study psychology in college.

Originally posted by Jemcrystal

Lucidia:  "Hi, Guildmate Death_Luv, my name is Lucidia and I'd like to party with you in Wiley Canyon.  Oh, btw, my two-yr-old and I are about to get evicted because we can't pay rent."  

Death_Luv:  "Ah, errr, how bout them Dodgers?"

 

How do you deal with mmo peeps unloading personal baggage in game?

 

 

*[Made up names but the situation is vague copy from a encounter I had yesterday].

Depends on who you are yourself.

Social Person:

You would empathise be understanding, depending on your relationship with that other person you can sympathise and even try to help.

Asocial person:

You would ignore, stay silent, keep it game related in hopes they will stop.

Anti-Social person:

You would Break Party, recall somewhere else, change character, put them on ignore list or mute them or change Voice Channel

Asshole/sociopath:

You would Kill them and loot their stuff.

The sorry truth is there are many people who depend on online games for their primary source of human interaction. Often, this is a self-imposed circumstance, but I'm acquainted with a number of hardcore players who've disabilities (myself included) and find getting out of the house and socializing a somewhat insurmountable challenge.

Still, there's a time and place for everything. Were the player characterized by the OP a total stranger, I'd find it an uncomfortable conversation and would do my utmost to disengage. Contrariwise, if the player was someone with whom I'd become friendly, I might lend an ear and support or advice within my purview.

I'm certainly not bereft of empathy, but at the same time I tend to be a no-nonsense kind of player. When I'm engaged in a quest or group mission, I don't want to be bothered by chit chat that doesn't concern the game or specific matters at hand. One of the principal reasons I seek out MMOs is for their immersive quality -- call it escapism. I don't burden others with my real life issues and, generally, I'd much prefer they not burden me with theirs.

The sad part about MOST of the posts in here is that people care more about games than their fellow man.This is the direction society is moving ,the ME ME and i don't care about anyone else but me.Then people make excuses to justify their stance.

it doesn't matter you are in a game or not,you are dealing with REAL people behind those characters and inside a game made by real people.

People in the old days helped each other,everything from building each others house,to trading food back n forth.Can you imagine if back in those days,you got your house built by neighbours,then when they came in need of help you turned your head and said NOT NOW i am gaming !.

If i heard a person was losing their home,i would try to support them and definitely feel sorry for them,i would not snub my nose at them.How soon people forget when they needed an ear or help.The modern day selfishness amazes me.These low standards for morals,i have even seen by websites including this one [MMORPG.com] i have seen it in many people,then these standards get passed down to their kids until finally we have the lowest form of moral possible,where NOBODY cares about anyone ...period.

The title shows how naive people are,it calls PEOPLE >>>gamers.You think a person is any different because they game or read books or fix cars or go out jogging?people are still people and people with problems are still people in need.

How about you are gaming and hear a car crash in front of your house?Ignore it?What if it was a child hit riding a bike?ignore becuase you are gaming,it is not your concern right?What if the parent of that child came knocking on your door,ignore it ,you are gaming?

Originally posted by Wizardry

The sad part about MOST of the posts in here is that people care more about games than their fellow man.This is the direction society is moving ,the ME ME and i don't care about anyone else but me.Then people make excuses to justify their stance.

it doesn't matter you are in a game or not,you are dealing with REAL people behind those characters and inside a game made by real people.

People in the old days helped each other,everything from building each others house,to trading food back n forth.Can you imagine if back in those days,you got your house built by neighbours,then when they came in need of help you turned your head and said NOT NOW i am gaming !.

If i heard a person was losing their home,i would try to support them and definitely feel sorry for them,i would not snub my nose at them.How soon people forget when they needed an ear or help.The modern day selfishness amazes me.These low standards for morals,i have even seen by websites including this one [MMORPG.com] i have seen it in many people,then these standards get passed down to their kids until finally we have the lowest form of moral possible,where NOBODY cares about anyone ...period.

The title shows how naive people are,it calls PEOPLE >>>gamers.You think a person is any different because they game or read books or fix cars or go out jogging?people are still people and people with problems are still people in need.

How about you are gaming and hear a car crash in front of your house?Ignore it?What if it was a child hit riding a bike?ignore becuase you are gaming,it is not your concern right?What if the parent of that child came knocking on your door,ignore it ,you are gaming?

 

I understand, and agree with you to a point, except ...

There's a huge difference between the people living next door to me and a pixilated name on my computer screen. Oceans of difference.

When that parent comes knocking on my door, I will likely have seen them around the neighborhood, friend or not I can readily assess whether they mean me harm -- can see their face, gage the inflection in their voice, assess body language. I can also look into the street and quickly determine whether there's actually been an accident. I cannot -- and let repeat that -- I cannot do any of those things by way of a chat screen, even less so if I have little to no previous conversational history with the person.

All kinds of people play online games, and unfortunately the relative anonymity of it too often brings out the worst in people. So, for better or worse, most of us put up a wall that would not ordinarily exist when interacting with people face to face. I've got a kind, trusting heart, but I've been scammed once too often, and over the past 12 years of online gaming, I've certainly endured enough EMOs and drama queens to understand there's a huge cadre of people online who are seeking attention however they can get it.

So, yeah, I'm suspect and not a little chagrined when relative strangers approach me in the context of a game and want to tell me how bad off they are, or as has happened several times, approach me wanting free gear or in-game money because they haven't the time or inclination to earn it themselves.

I donate generously to select charities, will never turn a neighbor or family member from my door, and annually drop a 20 into the red bucket at Christmastime, And, when appropriate, I will listen to others' problems during the course of playing an MMO. But, despite the guilt you're trying puke on us, I do not see it as my duty to play bleeding heart to every stranger who comes crying to my when I'm trying to enjoy a game.

And since you're so easy with your anecdotes, imagine you're sitting in a movie theater with your family when a stranger in the row behind you starts whispering in your ear that he just broke up with his girlfriend. You might feel bad for him, but do you really want to hear a stranger's sob story? No you don't.

Originally posted by Jemcrystal

Lucidia:  "Hi, Guildmate Death_Luv, my name is Lucidia and I'd like to party with you in Wiley Canyon.  Oh, btw, my two-yr-old and I are about to get evicted because we can't pay rent."  

Death_Luv:  "Ah, errr, how bout them Dodgers?"

 

How do you deal with mmo peeps unloading personal baggage in game?

 

 

*[Made up names but the situation is vague copy from a encounter I had yesterday].

Well, as a Giants fan...I just put that Dodger fan on /ignore....I can't help his insanity nor his poor choice of a baseball team...

Originally posted by bunnyhopper
Gank them and loot their stuffz.

 This made me chuckle.

To answer the OP, the only thing I can remember that was a personal problem was a guildie that lost his Dad. We all typed our condolences and continued playing.

There were less people in the "old days."  You knew who was a scam artist and who wasn't.  If a new person came to town everyone acted suspicious of them until they proved themselves honest/sane.  And during the potato famine no one had the strength to be nice unless they were in a clan.  And even then you were hard pressed.

I'm proud of peeps who stay soft even with so many swindlers afoot.  Scam artists are good at befriending and taking you for a ride.  Internet is their playground.  And I think some are trolling for mates with the broken-wing approach goes on too.

I see a lot replies here are taking the middle ground approach.  Not ice cold baby but not gullible wallet handout either.  Society has not changed at all.  If you need help you go to your family and if you have no family you freeze in snow.

Still, I was curious what everyone would say.  This situation I was a third party in guild chat watching and no one knew I was not afk.  I felt bad for "Death_Luv" but I wasn't about to come to his aid.