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Level 0 Perspective

She cuts me into a thousand beautiful pieces.

Author: DopSillypant

I am a Perfect Game

Posted by DopSillypant Saturday April 18 2009 at 5:13PM
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I’m a perfect game.
I’m a perfect game.
I’m a perfect game.

I’m a perfect game,
A game for the next generation, optmized and bug free.

A multifaceted focus-tested user-generated unoriginal tabula rasa.
A narcissistic egotistic satisfactory experience that leaves you wanting more.

I’ve been upgraded and downsized.
I’ve gained subscriptions but lost revenue.
I’ve been featured and ignored.
I’m free to play, no need to pay, my servers will stay in shape.

I’m liked by the masses, and cater to the niche.
I get updated often, but no downtime.
I’m easy to learn, and hard to master.
I’m customizable, interchangeable, fully capable, and easily forgettable.

I’ve been prepurchased,
Preloaded,
Prepaid,
Preauthorized,
Premade,
Preexperienced,
Preoptimized,
And I’m overly pretentious.

I appeal to the casuals, and reward the hardcore.
I’m made for all ages, but suited for yours.
I’m innovative, interactive, not overreactive.
I’m graphically intensive, visually impressive, and I run on your cellphone.

I’m overused,
Overlooked,
Overgeneralized,
Overcomplicated,
Overdeveloped
Overrated,
Overambitious,
Overhyped,
And my fans are overzealous and overobese.

I’m revolutionarily traditional,
I’m innovatively uninspired.
I don’t force a grind, so that you don’t whine.
I want your attention, no need for devotion.
I’m a completed product, still in development.
I start on a high, with no end in sight.

User commented,
ESRB rated,
Statistically proven,
Market researched,
Work of pure perfection.
 

This is inspired and tributed to the late George Carlin and his work "I'm a Modern Man".  I strongly suggest Youtubing said work, it is a marvelous blend of comedy and sadistic presentation of the brutal reality of the modern age.

MadnessRealm writes:

Sort of wasted my time reading this. I prefered your previous topic as there was something we could discuss while this blog is about something all us players are aware of and tired of hearing companies repeating themselves over and over again (and actually fail).

Sat Apr 18 2009 5:51PM Report
DopSillypant writes:

Next one is back to the more concrete and invocative side of things :)

Sun Apr 19 2009 4:15PM Report

MMORPG.com writes:
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