So the question of the day is....
"How many gamers does it take to change a lightbulb?"
I searched the internet to find out just how many answers there were out there to this question. The results below are some of the funniest. Special note: these are not my punchlines. Credit has been given below each page where the punchline was found. And so with further ado...
How many gamers does it take to change a lightbulb?
"600. 1 to change it. The other 599 can't stop complaining how the other one was better."
"None. When one gamer finally finds one that he likes, the others will convince him it's broken."
"Only one, though four to six is optimal in order to properly balance the challenge rating."
"Man lightbulbs have been so Nerfed..."
"I'd go with five. One who notices it and complains about it but is too lazy to change it, another to actually do the deed, and then finally the last three to ask the second guy to get them drinks while he's up."
"Just one. And if you argue with me you can just find yourself a new guild!" (adjusted from DM for the purpose of additional humor)
"Only one. Because if two or more gamers are involved, they'll start to argue (about how to do it, what kind of lightbulb they should use, how in days past lightbulbs where oh so much better, who's the greater authority on lightbulbs, who's the most experienced, etc.), and won't get the job done."
"ALL of them! NEVER split the party!"
"A hundred thousand and one. One changes the lightbulb. The other hundred thousand go online on forums to complain how the light is now ruined forever."
"One, but they need to do the same 5 side-quests at least 5 times each to unlock access to the lightbulb, the socket, a ladder..."
"Unless you're using some kind of strategy guide, you'll never know there WAS a lightbulb changing quest."
"Just one, but it takes him hours to manage his inventory."
"Three, one to get confused because the light he bought doesn't work in his socket, another to be condescending, and a third to explain that his socket isn't good enough for the lights voltage."
(Note: I can not vouch for the originality of the following upper section as this "How many forum members does it take to change a lightbulb?" string has been heavily shared across several different forums in the past including the one here at MMORPG.com."
"1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again."
(The following however is a conversation that broke out on the same page as the responses posted above. Each statement was made by a different person in the string and they are all original and indicative of the kind of comedy gold that can only happen on an internet forum.)
"Guys, stay on topic please and settle down on the personal attacks. If you want to be idiots, there are plenty of other forums who would love to have you. Idiots."
"He's right. Besides, while y'all are in here talking sh*t about lightbulbs, I'm out having a real life and getting laid."
"lol right ur prolly a 13 y/o v-card lmao looser. unlike U my gf iz hawt and we have SEX like four time a day I know all about that stuff lol so dont tell me abbout it lolmao"
"Oh sure, joke about laht bubs and those that risk life and limb to change them, I hope it makes you feel better about yourself. I supposed you'd all rather curse the darkness. dorks. I'm outtie!"
"I have an announcement.
Some of the members of this site have become increasingly aware of a... change in the maturity and intelligence of the members on this site. While we once enjoyed interesting, informative and grammatically correct posts from our peers, the site has become increasingly flooded with.. well, just see above.
It is with much excitement then, that I announce GamersWithElectricalLighting - a new site, a site designed to provide a home for the more mature posters around here. You can check us out at gamerswithelectricallighting.com. Hope to see (some) of you all soon!"
"I'm not sure I appreciate your tone, are you calling me a racist?"
And finally, an actual gamer/blogger who wrote an actual blog about changing lightbulbs.
I didn't feel like writing tonight. My wife is running me hard and my game is putting me away wet, but I did feel like laughing and so I hope that some of this stuff made you laugh too.
See you in the games.