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Spouse Aggro!

I blog at, write for, run and post all over the net. HOWDY!

Author: beauturkey

Old men cry a lot.

Posted by beauturkey Monday June 15 2009 at 10:08PM
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This is hardly a scientific find (although there have been studies done) but I have noticed that as the men I know grow older, they grow more emotional. I think the better thing to say would be that men grow more nostalgic, more apt to shed a tear over old stories and songs. Women, on the other hand, become more aloof, less emotional or more practical.

Again, this is not scientific...just based on personal observation and a few little finds here and there.

Perhaps men hold back more emotion, or used to, than women and as they grow older they are less likely to hold back the emotion due to failing bodies and minds? Women, on the other hand, do away with so much sentimentality and go for a more practical approach to life, and being that women generally live longer than men, maybe women find themselves going at it more alone than earlier in their lives? (Of course, I am not talking about same-sex couples...or am I? Ugh...who knows. )


This brings me to why I decided to write this blog: Star Trek, the Next Generation. I just watched one of my favorite episodes in which Spocks father Sarek is showing signs of suffering with the Vulcan equivalent of Alzheimer's disease. To balance out the effects of the disease, Captain Picard must be all mind-melded on so that Sarek can "borrow" the captain's more steady nature. It works, and the Vulcan performs his duty negotiating with an alien species.

There is a great scene of emotional outpouring from Picard, and in the end of the show the best lines are given:

Sarek: I will take my leave of you, captain. I do not think we shall meet again.

Captain: I hope you're wrong, Ambassador.

Sarek: We shall always retain the best part of the other...inside.

Captain: I believe I have the better part of that bargain, Ambassador. Peace, and long life.

Sarek: Live long and prosper.

The whole thing about that is the line: "I do not think we shall meet again." That means forever, for all time. That is the part of life that we all fear: the final and lasting end. Perhaps as we grow older we grow more conscious about that, and we either grow more accustomed to it, become more fearful of it or just ignore it. I am, on one hand, obsessed with that final end, and I think about it to the point that I am literally aware of every day, nothing really slips by me (that's why I am such the airhead that I am.) On the other hand, I believe that I won't notice the end, anyway, so why bother about it?

That's what draws me to games that have a very visible element of finality to them, of death. I don't mean the kind of death as in Darkfall, if anything in a FPS shooter death is but a pause and then you are right back into the action. I mean death as in what survivors of tragedies see, of what refugees witness. It's the kind of death or tragedy that masses of people survive together, and it brings them together and creates a feeling of camaraderie.

It's fun to play-act in a world filled with tragedy, one like Ryzom's Atys or Vanguard's Telon. It's fun, in a way, to think about our characters hard times and to think of them as people that have been through a lot, and long for a brighter future. Personally, it helps me to forget the finality of real life to play in a world where death is everywhere, but of no danger to the real me.

So even though I am already an emotional person, I think I will be a total wreck by the time I'm elderly. Maybe then we will have virtual reality games like the Holo-deck on Star Trek, and I can act out my fantasies then, too. Until then, I will be happy as a lark, only to pause at the commercials for the ASPCA to cry like a little girl.

Game long and prosper.


Arcken writes:

I think you are wrong. As ive gotten older, Im no longer the angry rebellious teenager I once was. Ive mellowed out considerably as Ive aged. As have most of my friends as well.

"Older" men are guys from a different time, guys who fought in wars, guys who had to deal with unpleasant situations brought on by social norms of the time. Guys who were raised by backwards parents.

Thankfully were getting ever closer to an even playing field with women. By that I mean box sexes are becoming a little more like each other without the harness of the 1950s social values to hold them back.


Tue Jun 16 2009 3:52AM Report
beauturkey writes:

 Do you mean that emotionally you have "mellowed out" meaning that you don't feel those swells of emotion as much as when you were younger?

 And I really am talking more about an elderly person, not someone oldER. hehe

 Heck, some of these kids on here think I am ancient, probably, and I'm just 35. But every older man I knew became so emotional, er, nostalgic really, as they became old men. I just noticed it more in men, and read some studies that showed what I thought.







Tue Jun 16 2009 6:30AM Report
Arcken writes:

Okay I get what you are saying. If i had to hazard a guess, Id say it might has somethign to do with how it was considered the norm by older men brought up back in the day to supress their emotions instead of expressing them. All that supressing I'd imagine would handicap you down the road in life when you can no longer control them.

Wed Jun 17 2009 2:27AM Report
beauturkey writes:

 Actually, all this was written just to secretly confess that I cry at certain commercials.

 That's right, I do. If it's got abused animals in it, I cry. Kids, though..I don't cry. Strange.

 I kid. Thanks for the comments!






Wed Jun 17 2009 6:36AM Report writes:
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