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Not What You Expect

The thoughts and views of a girl gamer.

Author: Thradia

Never Cross This Line

Posted by Thradia Friday January 25 2008 at 10:20AM
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Please, I beg of you....

There are many instances where your fantasy, gaming life should never cross into your real life.  Never.

I am speaking of children.  No, no, not children playing the games. Not limiting them and all that crap that everyone likes to argue about.

That joy has come for you. You find out that you (or your wife) is pregnant! Yay?  Things go well and the two of you start deciding what to name it....

You see where I am going with this?

Please do not name your child after your avatar!!!!!! Unless it is a normal name, please don't do this!

I have a friend...male...that always plays female characters in game.  And he uses a very strange name, some one for every game.  Him and his girlfriend agreed...AGREED no less...that if it was a girl they would name it this name.

I don't want to say this name because the power of Google will find this post if he searches it. 

But trust me, it is wrong.  Thankfully, her last doctor visit determined that it was a boy.  Their boy choice is better.. and not going to match daddy's female dwarf in EQ2!

Remember that these children have to go to school and take the teasing for even normal names.  Name responsibly!

Techleo writes:

  Its odd how parents can be so cruel. Then again my name was odd. Thankfully I never got picked on because of it. Albeit I will name my child oddly if its a girl, Haellee. Both my name and my wifes  name and her name combined. Albeit both our names had to be cut in half to make it match.. LOL sorry rambling.

Fri Jan 25 2008 10:31AM Report
Anofalye writes:

A dad once name his child Rex, and the dog Mark.  (or something like that, don't recall the EXACT choice).


If it can help you feel better...schools have the POWER to force you to change the name of your child, and in fact, use this power a few dozens of time each year.  Some names are horribles, either pets names, objects name, some porn star nicknames, are all subject to a forced change.  (anyway here, the school have to be able to present the case in front of provincial authorities)  Let's face it, Spatula is going to be changed.


At any rate, it should be the parents who are caring, when this instance fails, our society usually have a few back-up systems...but...isn't it horrible to have to relly on it?

Fri Jan 25 2008 10:38AM Report
streea writes:

Kids will tease each other regardless of the name you give them. Always reminds me of the Simpsons episode where Homer and Marge are coming up with names for Bart...

While I agree that some common sense is needed when naming a child, picking something a little unusual isn't going to be the end of the world for them... they can always change it at 18 if they don't like it. Of course, if their name is REALLY out there or bad, well.. they'll have to live with the child's wrath.

Fri Jan 25 2008 11:13AM Report
Sornin writes:

Three words: Moon Unit Zappa.

I think there is definitely a line that can be crossed when it comes to names, and I despise the current trend of giving kids "unique" names, which are usually also weak and terrible. What happened to the strong names that were so popular up until the '90s?

I think for something so entwined with who we are, parents should pay close attention to the names they give their kids. If you give a kid a weak, fruity name like "Aidan" or "Elias", you are already colouring the first impression everyone will have of them.

Go one step further and give them some fantasy name you game with like "Illiawyn" and you are cursing them in ways they will rightfully hate you for. :P

Fri Jan 25 2008 11:32AM Report
Thradia writes:

Schools have the power to force you to change the name of your child??

Really? I've never heard of that before..but then again...I didn't go to school with anyone named too strangly.

I like unique names...but yea...Illiawyn or the sorts...that is just wrong!

Fri Jan 25 2008 12:12PM Report
devacore writes:

Is the problem the name or society? rhetorical question, i know the answer.

Fri Jan 25 2008 12:20PM Report
Hrothmund writes:

I was named after a communist leader, and yes I did take a lot of sh*t for it, especially in the right-wing orientated army during my national service. However, I don't think naming your child in a unique matter is cruel, raising your children so that they actually pick on others in a maliscious and not playful way (There's a fine line there, I know.) is.

However, I think it is moronic to name your child after your avatar! I mean, get your priorities straight people!

Fri Jan 25 2008 12:39PM Report
Vrika writes:

Aren't there laws against picking inappropriate names in you country? At least in where I live (Finland), one can't be named with a name that is diffirent than our naming customs (unless one's parent or parents are foreigners). And it effectively stops people from picking up really strange names.

Fri Jan 25 2008 12:54PM Report
Hrothmund writes:

Vrika, I'm Finnish as well, and there law for naming is actually quite lax.

You can name your children pretty 'creatively' without any trouble from the law.

Fri Jan 25 2008 1:16PM Report
devacore writes:

Personally why is it our concern what people name their children.  Do we have to make fun of people who are different then the norm.   Vrika, I think most countries have similiar law but in the sense naming your child "toilet paper" or something what would make normal dialogue difficult.

Fri Jan 25 2008 1:44PM Report
patrikd23 writes:

Name your child with a name that you can see your self have had when you where young, that will not incourage other children to pick on. Parents need to think outside their own box when they name a child and not give them a name like Conan or Hellboy or so.

Fri Jan 25 2008 2:16PM Report
Hrothmund writes:

Patrik, rather than going out of my name to think of a suitable name, I think I would rather focus on actually building up my child's self-esteem, so he or she would not be bothered byt the kids who find it necessary to pick on others.


Won't know what I'll do before I actually have children, though. =)

Fri Jan 25 2008 2:21PM Report
Sornin writes:

"I think I would rather focus on actually building up my child's self-esteem, so he or she would not be bothered byt the kids who find it necessary to pick on others."

That is a good plan, but the flaw in your reasoning is that this is mutually exclusive to choosing a normal, sensible name that your child would like to have.

Do both!

Do not put your child at a slight disadvantage by naming them something silly just for the sake of being "different". Give them a normal name and help them build self esteem.

I have two friends with bizarre names, and they are both balanced people. But, they do wish they had different names - not because of being picked on (they weren't), just because if you are going to have a label on yourself your whole life, it may as well be a good, strong one.

Oh, and changing your name after 18 years is not so easy - just get it right the first time.

Fri Jan 25 2008 2:36PM Report
Hrothmund writes:

I have a unique name, and it help build up both my self-esteem and my chracater and 'uniqueness'.

Naming your child creatively does not amount to naming them stupidly.

I at least don't want my son to be called the equivalent of 'John' or 'Matthew' or 'Raymond'.(I'm Finnish, so I will go with a Finnish name.)

Sornin, please note that I typed, "go out of my way to find a suitable name". I know there are many parents who stres sover the name of their child, which i think i just stupid. if you give your children the love, guidance and education they deserve a simple name won't hinder their future possibilities.

Fri Jan 25 2008 2:41PM Report
steuss writes:

Our gaming avatars are our own little "babies" if you will. They represent that which we want to express as a powerful extension of ourselves. Our Avatars are the virtual manifestation of our wills. So like our children are our progeny. I think it is fitting that we would name our children after our avatars, after all they are pretty similar, only different in their "realness" factor. (granted there is a huge leap from my eq2 char and my child, but the sentiment is similar).

If the naming is done in good taste, then i see NO problem whatsoever from naming your child after your avatar.

After all, have you not heard, met, or actually felt, a special connection to a revered avatar? Have you encountered a unique name in a game and then asked about it, and got a loving response? Some people hold their names in absolute reverence, and it is only natural to carry that same reverence to their most sacred children, and what better way to express that than by naming their child something close and dear to their hearts?

Fri Jan 25 2008 2:56PM Report
Sornin writes:

"If the naming is done in good taste, then i see NO problem whatsoever from naming your child after your avatar."

To me, that is a very neurotic thing to do.

I mean, your avatar is your puppet, a play thing, an alter ego - a toy you pick up and put down from time to time. I worry that anyone who would consider naming their child after their avatar would have that same approach to parenting. It is living vicariously through them, at the least - why else do it? You are giving real life to your imagination.

Give them their own identity, don't push your avatar's on to them - keep that your own. I think it is creepy to play, say, "Ceril" in WoW and then go pick up your son "Ceril" from baseball practice. There seems to be a distortion of reality there, even if done with best of intentions.

I really have to question the thought process behind the whole thing. Then again, I also think naming a child after yourself (John Sr. and John Jr.) is a silly thing to do, and I suppose this is just an extension of that.

Fri Jan 25 2008 3:14PM Report
fiskbulle writes:

This is just as stupid as the "No foul language" campaigns that some people like to believe will stop people from being assholes. THEY DONT. Remove the words "fuck you" and I can be just as rude and sarcastic with the word "good job".

Sure, it's harder in written form, but with a little body language and tone of voice, I think I can get what I think about someone across.

You know what worries me in your story? It's not that they wanted to call their child "Brünhilde" or whatever.. it's that you don't have to balls to be honest with your "friends", but instead decides to whine about it behind their backs on the internet. Good job. <---

While I'm not saying I disagree with you in that it MIGHT be idiotic to call your child "Aeyeoeoeohewhewyn".... a name like "Arwen" might infact be socially accepted. I happen to know of a Swedish girl called Arwen. She seems to be doing quite well. (She's smoking hot btw)

Either way, If there is only one thing I can garantee you, it's that some children will find a way to dominate other children. Wether it's by namecalling or not doesn't really matter. If it's the "inter-family relations" that worry you, that probably should worry you no matter what the child is called.

Fri Jan 25 2008 5:20PM Report
fiskbulle writes:

Btw, anofalye, wich country do you live in? Communist china?

Schools changing childrens names? I couldn't accept that under ANY circumstance. Talk about being out of their juristiction. Jesus christ...

Fri Jan 25 2008 5:32PM Report
Narrator writes:

Schools forcibly changing a child's name?  I'm, uh, gonna have to raise the B.S. flag on that one.  But it's been nice chatting.

Fri Jan 25 2008 10:53PM Report
neschria writes:

IIRC, France *does* have naming laws of some sort, and Vrika says there are in Finland. Not every country will allow you to name your daughter "Diesel Engine" or your boy "Sue".

I named my daughters unusual names (ranging from pretty unique Greek mythology name for the first, an ethnically ambigous name for the second, to an alternate spelling of an increasingly common name for the third). The oldest two love their names. The youngest is 2, so she doesn't really have an opinion yet. I stuck to normal names for my boys.

On the other hand, I'd have to think long and hard before I saddled a kid with one of my character names. Aside from the fact that I love the random name generators and tend to end up named things like "Unaeni" and "Neschria", there's always a point when the kid wants to know how you came up with their name. Do you REALLY want to tell them it was your favorite name for RPG characters?

Sat Jan 26 2008 9:29AM Report
soulwynd writes:

Countries are retarded, they didn't let me name my kid Senor Vorpal Kickass'o.



Sat Jan 26 2008 10:46AM Report
Flungmuk writes:

My mother wanted to name me Ulysses...Thankfully my dad talked her into Scott.

30+ years later and I'm still very glad he made that call. Growing up in a small redneck town in BC, it probabaly saved me from many beatings. :)

But I have met some people that have gone crazy with hero worship and names...Spock, Dar, James and his sister MoneyPenny (Bet you cant guess the last name) even a Raistlin.

In some of these cases, the kid has a normal middle name, and goes by that...Apart for poor Raistlin, his dad was able to convince his wife (now divorced...Can't imagin why) to agree to a middle name of Fistandantilus.

I don't think I'll name any son's of mine Flungmuk. :)

Tue Feb 05 2008 4:30PM Report writes:
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